Social media is great a lot of the time. You get to keep up with old friends and enjoy random, hilarious musings on Twitter from complete strangers.
One of the drawbacks of social media is that there’s so much great stuff out there, you miss some real gems along the way.
But that’s where we come in! We’re here to show you some great, hilarious tweets you might’ve missed along the way.
1. You nailed the synopsis and impressed her.
[sees girl reading The Catcher in the Rye]
"Ah I love that book. The way he just [clenches fist] catches all that frickin rye."
— David Hughes (@david8hughes) June 1, 2014
2. He’s in charge.
Sir, sir, if you con, SIR IF CONTUNUE TO RAISE YOUR VOICE I'M GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOU TO LEAVE SIR. pic.twitter.com/WIuyCntgBg
— *MMCHT* (@Jehwauhn) November 21, 2014
3. Ooohhh, that’s kind of dark.
Ambulances are the original Transformers because sometimes they transform mid-ride into hearses
— Megan Amram (@meganamram) January 29, 2014
4. Does this describe your life?
I’d like to buy a vowel, Pat
Is there a ??
“There are 14”
I’d like to solve. ‘OMG LOL I CAN’T EVEN ??????????????’
“You got it”
— Dr. Pumpkin Spiceotope (@BuckyIsotope) July 21, 2014
5. Seriously, can’t we just let it go?
i can't believe i have to keep washing this stupid body until i die
— pascalle (@frenchielaboozi) February 27, 2014
6. Cover up your feet, grandfather clock.
A grandfather clock is just like a regular clock except it wears sandals even though it has disgusting toe nails.
— steve suckington (@SteveSuckington) December 14, 2014
7. God, we need to have a talk.
When God closes a door, he opens a window. Our heating bill is outrageous & six raccoons got in last night. Please God, this has to stop.
— rob fee (@robfee) February 16, 2014
8. Great, I blew it again…
I hate when the other guy goes for a handshake and I go for an open-mouth kiss and oh great now I probably didn't get this job
— Jeff Wysaski (@pleatedjeans) October 19, 2014
9. That’s some good life advice.
"You CAN even."
– white girl life coach
— Reverend Scott (@Reverend_Scott) March 19, 2014
10. They have a unique relationship.
Just heard a guy at the dog park tell his dog "NO!" and then more quietly, "We talked about this!"
— summer goth ? (@NicCageMatch) April 10, 2014
11. Pretty much sums it up.
CATS: We got a lifetime of naps and belly rubs. What about you?
HUMANS: Superior intellect
C: Cool what's it for?
H: Math and feeling bad
— Opinion Leader (@InternetHippo) September 21, 2014
12. Why was Mother so mean?
My mom would wake up early just to cut the crust off my sandwiches for lunch. She knew the crust was my favorite part. She hated me so much.
— Shane (@Shanehasabeard) January 20, 2014
13. The most formidable opponent.
My high-school wrestling coach called me "the raccoon" cause I was small but feisty and ate garbage and gave people lyme disease
— Musky L. (@LostCatDog) June 4, 2014
14. You don’t need permission to talk…yet.
me: [raises hand]
my date: again, that's not necessary
— chuuch (@ch000ch) November 10, 2014
15. Zing! This is pretty darn funny.
[shows up late for first day of new job]
*blames it on rush hour*
[shows up late for second day of new job]
*blames it on rush hour 2*
— brent (@murrman5) September 11, 2014
Now, aren’t you glad you got filled in on those funny tweets from years past? Of course, you are!
Do you have any favorite tweets that you think we should’ve included? Share them in the comments!