Ok, so, hear me out: everybody is ageing differently than they used to.
I mean, we’re all still ageing. And we used to be too. That’s why we are now. Because the past brought us here, which is later than then. But NOW we’re noticing that then, the folks who’d had more then than some of us did, they were SHOWING all the then to now on their faces more than the we-us of now are. You know what I mean?
Ok, probably not. Let’s let Twitter step in and explain all of this a little better. Please take note of our evidentiary exhibits below.
10. The hypothesis
Brandon McCarthy is onto something, even though he doubts himself here.
this is nonsense but did people in the past look older when they were younger?
— Brandon McCarthy (@BMcCarthy32) December 27, 2019
9. Swing and a miss
I mean, it’s not that he looks bad, but 24?! This man CLEARLY has a reverse mortgage.
1987. Ron Karkovice was 24 years old. pic.twitter.com/XNrFBPZiAW
— Rooting for #Brands (@CerowB) December 27, 2019
8. Rock steady
Somebody get him in here, I have questions that need answered.
The Rock looked older in high school than he does right now. pic.twitter.com/QS2yM7z4gH
— Nathan ?️? (@nthomasrios) December 27, 2019
7. Everybody knows your name
That’s like, my age. Cool.
George Wendt was THIRTY THREE in the first season of Cheers. John Ratzenberger was 34! pic.twitter.com/s239yApKOl
— stefanielaine ? (@stefanielaine) December 27, 2019
6. Bird is the word
Things are different when you’re flying that high in the sky.
Larry Bird (pictured age 25-30 probably) looked like he ran his own plumbing business for 30 years and played basketball at the local gym in the evenings to stay young and active pic.twitter.com/LqAadr4NjP
— javier vera (@_JVera) December 28, 2019
5. Smoke ’em in you got ’em
Ooooh, so THAT’s the secret!
Yeah dude people in the past smoked everywhere all the time, didn’t wear sunscreen, didn’t moisturize, didn’t hydrate, didn’t do Pilates, didn’t ritually drink the blood of infants. Etc etc
— David Foster Wallace Shawn (@CogitoErgoJokes) December 27, 2019
4. They grow up so fast
Pick up ANY of them you can find, it’s ABSOLUTELY true.
Absolutely. Look at any high school yearbook from the ‘50s. The seniors look like they have a middle management position, two kids, and a mortgage.
— Kevin Lussier (@KevinKlussier) December 27, 2019
3. Hey Bobby
He looks like he has a grandson who’s a senior in high school.
1969. Sir Bobby Charlton was *32*. pic.twitter.com/H7bbgF027t
— Shane Bua (@ThatShaneBua) December 27, 2019
2. Drink ’em up too
Well, that would explain…me…I guess.
Cigarettes and cheap booze aged a lot of young people back then.
— Matt Smith (@DTMattSmith) December 27, 2019
1. And then there’s Maude
But wait…the CAT was 29?!
No doubt. For instance. I’m 44, the same age (give or take a year) as the t.v. character Maude when the series started. I do NOT look like her, even on my very worst day. This was a bad day. (My 29-year-old cat was a few hours from dying.) pic.twitter.com/Hv1aMfhbrP
— Rebecca (@BaseballReba) December 27, 2019
Alright, well, after that cat revelation I have a whole new rabbit hole to dive down.
What do you make of all this?
Tell us your analysis in the comments.