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If you are still throwing basic toys like pom-poms and fuzzy mice at your cat, then you need to level up. Today’s cats are into purposeful brands that provide value and experiences. They crave adventure, not your raggedy AF crumpled ball of paper or the bottle cap from your hard cider.

Fortunately for your kitty, a company called SUCK UK has stepped up. Your cat wants a tank? Guess what. Your cat can get a tank.

Photo Credit: SUCK UK

The tank arrives as a cardboard foldable – so easy, a child could put it together it. Instructions included.

 

Photo Credit: SUCK UK

You might be thinking why can’t I grab another hard cider and make Mr. Business his own tank out of an empty La Croix case?

Because, you can’t. That’s why.

The company also makes other crazy kitty curios.

Sick beats are on the way with this Cat Scratch Turntable.

Photo Credit: SUCK UK

To augment his DJ career, he will need the Cat Scratch Laptop.

Photo Credit: SUCK UK

After a hard week of handing out flyers and DJing, your kitty will want to unwind with some alone time. A weekend in a cabin or teepee should do the trick.

Photo Credit: SUCK UK

When you give the gift of lifestyle, your little killing machine is sure to love you ’til death do you part. Just make it snappy with putting the things together, or you’ll likely lose your furry buddy to the shipping box.