Well, this sure is an interesting story.
It comes to us from Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole?” page and it left a woman asking if she was rude in how she responded to her nephew.
Let’s see what happened.
AITA for saying ‘because I work’ when my nephew asked why my child has a nice toy?
“Cultural context: . It sounds weird but the women in my family aren’t expected to work. You’re actually looked down on if you do, as it insinuates that your husband isn’t ‘good’ enough to support you.
Arranged marriages are a thing too, and generally a prospective partner is picked for you based on their wealth and social status – their personality or looks just aren’t that important. I’m trying to keep the word count down explaining this, but I do want to mention that as old fashioned as this sounds, I’ve seen these marriages succeed at around the same rate as the non-arranged marriages I’ve witnessed.
With that outta the way…I married for love. My husband is awesome – we gel on an emotional and intellectual level, he’s hot af, and nearly half a decade into marriage I’m still waiting for the honeymoon period to end. Even better – he doesn’t base his sense of worth and masculinity on wether or not his wife works – dude is freaking proud of what I do.
My husband is from the same culture as I am, and as bad as it sounds, we would never have matched with each other because he wasn’t at my ‘level’ of status and wealth.
His brother got a wife the traditional way, and she doesn’t work. She really sweet, we get along, but it’s clear she kinda looks down on me because I work. I send my kiddo to daycare three days a week, and she’s dropped comments about it in the past which I just brushed off. I don’t blame heR – it’s just the way she was brought up.
Ofc because we’re a two income family, I could set up a nursery for my child and I have a cute playroom for them. When my nephew and niece come over (twice a year for about a week), they always have the time of their lives. I always send them home with gifts so they aren’t too sad when they leave.
Anyway, I had bought my child a play kitchen for the playroom, and when my niece and nephew came to stay, they loved it. It was too big to let them take home, so I figured I’d order it online for them.
While I was sitting with my SIL, my nephew started asking why they didn’t have one at home. My SIL said something to the effect of ‘because it’s too expensive’. My nephew then asked ‘well how come ‘my child’ can have one’.
Without thinking I replied ‘because I work’.
As soon as it was out of my mouth I knew I’d f**ked up. To make things worse, my nephew started asking his mum why she didn’t work so he could have play kitchen. She scolded him, then was stand offish with me until they left two days later. I didn’t send the play kitchen because I wasn’t sure how she’d take it.
Before I get asked why I didn’t apologize: I had no idea how to. I really like my career, my child is happy going to daycare (they are a very social toddler). I’m not ashamed of working. I am ashamed of how I made probably made her feel.”
And here’s what Reddit users had to say about this.
One reader said that the woman wasn’t a jerk and that, while it was a slip of the tongue, it was also true.
Photo Credit: Reddit
Another person said the woman’s response boiled down to one thing: the simple truth.
Photo Credit: Reddit
This individual pointed out that the sister-in-law seems to have said a lot of hurtful things in the past and that this woman shouldn’t feel bad for being honest.
Photo Credit: Reddit
Finally, this reader said that the woman did not act like an a**hole and that she has nothing to apologize for.
Photo Credit: Reddit
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