Dating, relationships, coupling, marriage–all these things.
They’re good for a lot of us because it’s nice to have a ride or die on this crazy trip called life. The wholesomeness and kindness and adventure that comes with sharing your existence with another person can be great, but maybe sometimes it’s a bit less of a white-hot firework sort of love and more like a bottle rocket that sizzles into the air with a very unsatisfying “piff”.
But hey, fireworks are still fireworks as far as I’m concerned–and love in any form is still love, as you will see.
1. Some tolerance is better than no tolerance…
But sometimes the best policy is zero room for error.
It’s a good thing my wife doesn’t have a zero tolerance policy.
— Boyd's Backyard™ (@TheBoydP) January 18, 2021
2. My eyes are up here.
Marriage does have its perky–I mean perks.
My husband and I have been married for 27 years and dude still does that thing where when I'm speaking he looks at my face and then my chest. Half the time, I'm like, did I get food on my shirt–nope, just titties.
— Rachel Noise (@RachelNoise) January 22, 2021
3. I have some ideas.
Years ago, the woman who would one day be my wife asked me to be her date to a friend's wedding. On the ride home, she asked me for my thoughts about the ceremony. I said it was actually really nice. She then looked at me lovingly & said, "don't get any ideas."
— A Bearer Of Dad News?? (@HomeWithPeanut) January 27, 2021
4. Who touched the thermostat!?
Saving money? Or cuddle opportunity?
I wish I loved anything as much as my husband loves turning down the thermostat.
— ?ᑌᖇᔕᑌᒪᗩ? (@3sunzzz) January 24, 2021
5. Loading the dishwasher is an art.
Truly, we have to admit that. Kid’s got the skills.
Overheard my 7 year old daughter say, “That doesn’t go there” to my husband while loading the dishwasher and I’ve never been more proud.
— ThisOneSays (@ThisOneSayz) January 25, 2021
6. I’m not mad, you’re mad.
I madder than mad that I’m so mad for you.
“I’m mad that you’re mad that I’m mad.”
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) January 23, 2021
7. Mornings can get lonely…
…It’s hard to make friends at 6 AM.
My husband keeps trying to talk to me before 8am and I don’t understand how morning people survive into adulthood
— Real Life Mommy (@reallifemommy3) January 24, 2021
8. Let’s put on a movie while we eat.
Said me who’s still scrolling through Netflix because dinner’s been done for an hour, the dishwasher is roaring, the kitchen is clean, and she’s already asleep on the couch.
My husband and I just got two additional streaming services so now we can argue about even more shows that one of us doesn’t want to watch.
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) January 29, 2021
9. K, cool.
But for real, I love you, Kk?
Dating – Every Kiss begins with Kay.
Marriage – Every conversation ends with K.
— SlappNuttz (@SlappNuttz) January 24, 2021
10. I’m a sucker for a tight right angle.
Four corners of bliss.
My husband just walked in on me getting a pretty intimate backrub from this one wall corner in the kitchen and suggested we get a room.
— Darlin’ Darla (@Darlainky) January 25, 2021
11. Come on, five more minutes.
Like I said earlier, it’s hard to make friends at 6 AM.
My wife shook me awake at 7am on a Sunday “because it’s not raining, and we have a lot to do today”
Holy shit, I married my father
— Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) January 24, 2021
12. I if you like it then you…
…put a ring on it, so I’m going to ensure that you can’t stay mad *whispers* forever.
When my husband is mad at me,
I like to point at my wedding ring
and whisper “forever”
— Midge (@mxmclain) January 26, 2021
Relationships are fun. So go make some of those fireworks with the one you love.
If you have a hilarious partner or husband or wife and a story about them to tell, just drop us a comment. We’d love to hear it.