Every single person on this planet has a unique makeup.
It doesn’t make one type of person better than the next or the one, but I do think that people who are naturally shy kind of get a bad rap.
It’s like we think they need to be fixed or something, to be outgoing and cool with social gatherings like the rest of us, but why would that be?
These people are shy and have made their peace with it, but they really wish others would stop these behaviors.
1. Why do teachers do this?
In college, my professors just love giving us projects that end up with class presentation. I told a professor how I hate speaking in front of people cause I’m shy/awkward/stuttering my words when nervous. He said try your best
The week of, he sent out a email that said, “It’s Brenna’s favorite part. The speaking part”
2. You can’t have it both ways.
Being told to lower your voice and shut up as a child, then as a teen being told to speak up for myself more and answer when I am asked something, …then growing up never speaking unless spoken to, or in case of emergency.
As a shy girl I only talked when my friends did. I also didn’t go to my teacher when I accidentally smashed my thumb with a hammer for a class project. Since I was trying my best to be quiet and not disturb anyone, I realized no one noticed I smashed my thumb up. So after recovering from almost fainting at the sight of my blood oozing out, I walked up to the teacher so I wouldn’t bother anyone else and asked her if she had a first aid kit. She said Of course, why? Did you hurt yourself? And I just showed her my thumb, dripping with broken skin and said, “Kinda.” She was shocked I hadn’t screamed or said anything for a good 10 minutes and immediately set off to get the first aid and help dress my injury.
She knew I was quiet and shy, though I think it surprised her to realize to what extent. I figured I needed some help, and I absolutely had to ask, because my tiny first aid kit was only meant for papercuts and small scrapes.
Long story short: I was too shy to draw attention to my pain, and had to gather the courage, and breath to ask for assistance.
3. Are you from the Midwest?
Someone took my order from the shelf at the online order station at chipotle and I waited 45 MINUTES after the time it was supposed to be done before saying anything because I didn’t wanna be rude.
Not the literal worst thing to happen to me, but it is what stopped me from going to chipotle.
4. Just don’t say it.
When you talk and people say things like “oh I didn’t know you could talk” or “this is the first time I hear you talking”
5. I am full of cringe.
i also have a shy chipotle horror story. i was paying at the register and the guy asked me if i wanted anything to drink and i just said a bottle of water. he points to a fridge sort of behind him and they have like a million different brands of bottled water for whatever reason.
i got so overwhelmed when he asked me which brand that i literally just walked to the fridge and grabbed dasani. i practically walked into the kitchen. he was like “i could’ve just gotten it for you”. jdbdhdidbrjrhbd
6. Nix these expressions, too.
In the same vein as this, when I was a shy kid instead of a shy adult I’d spend quite a while in my bedroom in order to get personal space away from my family who are all chatterboxes. Almost every time I finally came out into the family room for a little bit of socializing everyone would always make a huge deal of seeing me.
“I didn’t even know you were here!” “Wow she’s socializing!” “She’s out of her cave!” And so many other things always said so derisively. Always made me just want to go back into my room to hide.
7. Does anyone like this?
Having a group of people sing ‘happy birthday’ to you.
8. Those moments stick with you.
I was at a friend’s house, his parents used to scare me. The dad had a thick Asian accent and due to my nerves, I guess I wasn’t paying attention. Didn’t realize the dad was full on asking how I was, and I just stood there awkwardly. I thought he was speaking to his son in Cantonese, i still think about this
I never corrected my boss when she mixed up my name on the first day. I had already introduced myself to some people by my real name, the other half of people my boss introduced me to, called me another. I felt too shy to correct her in front of the group. It just led to more awkward conversations, as the two names were completely different.
9. There’s nothing more awkward.
when your one friend takes you to roller world and then disappears with her girl friend and then her guy friend has to hang out with me cuz he didn’t want to leave me alone, but both are shy to make a conversation. so we just sit there awkwardly and wait for our mutual friend to come back
10. So many questions.
My shy buddy hated ordering coffee at the Starbucks in the Barnes N Noble bookstore.
They cannot accept your order and take your money… they had about 6 questions they have to ask first. She couldn’t stand it.
Her: I’d like a medium coffee
Them: Do you want light roast or dark roast? We don’t have medium, we have tall, okay? Do you need space for cream? What’s your name? Are you part of the (bookstore club)? Are you part of the Starbucks points?
I’m not sure if I’m remembering it right, but I think at least once she panicked and walked away mid interrogation.
11. That’s not the way to find out.
in my high school spanish class, some kid screamed “do you ever talk” at me in front of the entire class.
super embarrassing at the time, but hilarious to look back on.
12. Forced cohabitation, ugh.
My by far worst experience was living together with a roommate. I wasn’t able to talk to them and i thought they hate me
13. No speech required.
Had a moment like this when I was a kid. I’m not shy, but if I have nothing to say to you, I won’t.
Anyway, when I was 11 I was awarded the title of “quietest camper” and when I got up to get my shitty award, everyone was chanting “talk! Talk! Talk!”… As if they didn’t have the opportunity of the entire summer to take the time to hear what I had to say.
14. We weren’t supposed to have to talk.
Having to explain our project in a seminar when the one who had to do the task didn’t turn up…was really shaking in the process…
15. I don’t think he would have minded helping out.
When I was in HS, I killed my already dead grandpa couple of times to avoid social events.
16. Cat got your tongue.
While going to college I interned for the state’s largest business development corporation. In a meeting with c-suite executives the top dog was just making friendly conversation before we got started and asked me what classes I was taking.
To set the picture, I am just the peon note-taker and would never expect anyone to even notice that I was there, let alone put me on the spot with a long table of successful professionals staring at me.
I blacked out. Zero brain function. I mumbled a few inaudible grunts and umms before having no choice but to admit that I couldn’t remember. Oh my dog, I wanted to die. The looks of confusion and the awkward century that it took to switch topics amongst themselves still haunts me before bed.
17. Does anyone like this practice?
“Ok everyone, before we begin why don’t we go around the room and tell us a little about yourselves.”
18. Just let go, dude.
Went to a party. Guy I’ve never met walks up to me, shakes my hand, and says “hello, what’s your name? Where were you born? Where will you die? What’s in between?”
Not letting go of my hand the whole time. I completely locked up, had no idea what to say.
19. You’ll never forget that.
I went to this summer camp at a history museum around 4th grade. The second day they sprung on us that we would have to create a short play about a notable figure of our choice.
I’m already terrified and I make it worse by choosing to do mine on Cai Lun, the dude who invented paper. The “play” ended up being a 30 second monologue that was basically a condensed biography with me wearing these musty silk robes. After I slunk back to my seat, I realized that everyone else did like actual plays with dialogue and plots and stuff.
20. What a terrible moment.
I was in elementary and took a bus home each day. I missed my stop and I was so terribly shy and quiet the bus driver didn’t hear me. He went on to pick up high school students and didn’t notice I was still on the bus.
The high school students were so sweet and kind. They alerted the bus driver and he took me home. My mom was freaking out by the time I got home!
21. A stab in the back.
i dont talk much in class, and i interact with only a few people. Some of my classmates just thought i hate them, and cropped me out of their EOY class photos which they then posted on ig.
i dont really care about their posts, i just felt really hurt they cropped me out
22. How horrible they had to go.
Mandatory speech class when I was a freshman in college. I’d do the thing, then go back to my dorm and throw up.
Really freaked out my roommate (who I barely spoke to). 5 speeches that semester…it was a nightmare.
23. I am cringing so hard.
Sat at the back of the class in Spanish, when the teacher from the front asks a question. Being the little nerd I was in school my hand shot up, the teacher then looked over, pointed directly at me and said “Si, Seniorita”
I was a very feminine, underdeveloped and late through puberty 15 year old boy with longer than usual hair.
I stopped answering any teachers questions willingly from that point.
24. Why do people do this?
I am a bit shy when first meeting people so after getting to know me, I often hear “When I first met you, I thought you were such a bitch.”
25. A gentleman for a reason.
Entering a new place for the first time, be it a shop or a bar or a resteraunt. I’m always play the gentleman and hold the door open for my partner so she can assess the area before I sheepishly shuffle in behind.
26. This stereotype is really done.
i get told by people now that everyone (including them) thought i was the weird kid that was going to shoot the school up. it hurts man i never did anything wrong but just not talk to people.
27. They used it all up.
Putting a year’s worth of confidence into a job interview, just to be the quiet one after you get the job.
The anxiety dude…
28. People just need to talk more!
In 4th grade I was in a new school and most of the girls avoided me bc they thought I was a bully (found out in 5th grade).
I was so sad bc I thought no one wanted to be my friend and that they hated me. I cried and begged my mom not to let me go to the Christmas party. When school reopens, they were like ‘why didn’t you come? We missed you’
29. Why are some girls like this?
In middle school I didn’t have any friends in my scheduled lunch period so I had to find some people I sorta knew to sit with. It went well for a while until this one girl just started being extremely rude.
She would just randomly start picking apart the way I look to someone else sitting at the table out of nowhere and I would just keep my head down and eat and pretend like I didn’t hear anything she would say. I’m a decent looking female but it really did a number on my self esteem.
30. Laughter is not always the best medicine.
I was in a group therapy session as a kid like maybe 14. I really had to go to the bathroom but we werent allowed to during the session. I was sorta balled up in the center of the room, not like emotional or anything just sitting comfortably hugging my knees cuz all the spots on the couch were taken.
Some girl had just finished telling a story of her abuse. She was crying and there was no other sound. Was sort of that awkward but respectful silence that fills the space when you wanna be supportive but saying anything at all would somehow seem inconsiderate.
It was into this yawning void that i farted. I knew it was coming. Id been staving off the gurgling in my stomach for some time now. Id broken into a sweat already with the sheer effort of will to delay the inevitable. It was no use.
I tried to discreetly shift my weight and maybe muffle the sound. I failed. This was neither silent nor deadly. It effortlessly shattered the silence like sledgehammer vs a christmas ornament.
Another moment of silence swallowed the sound but it was a void of disbelief. Then some kid yelled as loud as they could.. “jen farted!!!” And the entire room collapsed into helpless laughter while i promptly turned to stone and died on the spot.
31. Save it for therapy.
A friend hugged me at a party and then said WOW YOU SMELL REALLY GOOD.
And then I swear to God EVERYONE got up and went I WANT TO SMELL and I was surrounded by people sniffing me seconds after walking in to a party. I wanted to die. It wasn’t even perfume or anything it was my hair oil.
If I could afford therapy this would definitely come up.
32. Be a good friend.
Going to a crowded party with one friend who really wanted to drag you along but then disappears.
Take note, non-shy people, and stop making the whole world about you!
If you’re shy, what would you add to this list? Tell us about it in the comments!