Think your parenting skills aren’t up to snuff? Maybe you have those thoughts that all parents have, but you just don’t feel comfortable sharing?

Well, you should meet Chris Illuminati. I’m assuming that’s not his real name, but he’s the single dad of two kids AND also an author. Every week he shares some honest, hilarious advice and observations about parenting on his Instagram account – his brilliant Post-it notes have to be seen to be believed. Seriously game changing stuff here, which he reposts on A Message With A Bottle.

Have a looksie:

He recently told Scary Mommy that the account came about due to dumb luck:

“The original idea behind the notes was just a personal joke the first time I was home alone with my son. I keep notes for my writing jobs so I wrote a note that said ‘Feed baby. Change baby. Don’t let baby die’ and stuck it on the board with my other notes.”

Yes, it’s a good thing to not let your baby die. Pro tip.

And so, it became a thing…

“So I thought ‘what if I left reminders for myself on how to be a better parent’ but those just evolved into jokes. I put them online and people really loved them.”

And that’s how an Instagram account, now with over 38K followers, was born!

But it’s not just advice for himself. Chris posts a lot of “yep, that’s me” thoughts all parents share.


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Parents. Where’s our fucking trophies? #parenting #parenthood #dadlife #kids #parentinglife #fatherhood #messagewithabottle #youthsports

A post shared by Chris Illuminati (@messagewithabottle) on

And dad jokes…

More tips for being a pro parent…

And some that tug at the heart strings…

Check out the following posts Chris put up, and see if you can relate. I bet you can. 🙂

“Yo homes, a Bel-Air”

Oh, that’s not a bad idea…


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Highly recommended!!! + + + #parenting #parenthood #dadlife #kids #singledad #singleparent #parentinglife #fatherhood #messagewithabottle

A post shared by Chris Illuminati (@messagewithabottle) on

Thankfully, the neighbors approve!


No sense in letting good food go to waste!

Gotta make those lunches!

“Parent” needs to be paid more, right?

Omg, we’re all crying now Chris! Thanks!

Dad. Of. The. Year.