Losing one’s virginity is personal. Unfortunately, there are a lot of conflicting messages about what people should and shouldn’t do, or telling them when they should start having sex.
There are many different reasons and motivations behind when people decide they’re ready for sex. 10 people told Buzzfeed the reasons why they decided that waiting until marriage was the best choice for them.
10. To Avoid Comparisons
“When I meet that person that’s hopefully my forever, I don’t want to feel held back by comparisons or mistaken encounters.
I want them to be it for me. I don’t expect the same thing in return. I know that more than likely, my partner will have those experiences and that’s okay!
I’m waiting because of my own emotions and know not everyone thinks/feels the same.”
9. Faith and Precaution
“My religion is a big reason, but I’ve seen how sex with the wrong person can ruin your life: STDs, unplanned pregnancy, feelings you can’t get rid of.
At the same time, I totally get why people don’t want to wait.
For me though, it’s a commitment I made when I was very young, and I’m holding to it.”
8. Because Some Body Parts Are Gross
“I’m waiting to have sex because I’m a Christian and want to obey God…but also the idea of having to see more than one penis freaks me out.”
7. You Can’t Take Chances Sometimes
“I attended a high school where a lot of teens became pregnant.
While I knew that birth control worked the majority of the time, I didn’t want to take that chance.
I wanted to graduate college and establish myself in my career before I was married and had a child.”
6. Because of Asexuality
“I realized a few years ago that I’m asexual…I don’t experience sexual attraction at all.
I have had romantic feelings for some people and gone out on a few dates, but sex is such a vulnerable and scary thing that I prefer to wait until I’m in a committed relationship.”
5. To Avoid Using Birth Control
“The reason I’m waiting is because I’m personally against birth control.
I think it’s great and people should be educated and have easier access to it, but I just don’t want to use it.”
4. To Stay Alive
“Because if the condom broke and I got pregnant, my parents would kill me.”
3. For The Sake of The Relationship
“I’m waiting because I believe that if my partner is willing to wait until marriage in a time where hookup culture is so predominant, it means our relationship is more than just sex.”
2. Because It Felt Right
“I waited until my wedding night. When I was younger, it was a religious thing, but then the reason became because I wanted to be able to say that I had only ever done that with my husband. Maybe that sounds antiquated. My ex sure thought so. He pressured me so much and pushed me to do things I wasn’t comfortable with. Then I realized that if he loved or respected me, he wouldn’t ask me to sacrifice something I fought so hard to keep.
Once I realized, that I ditched him, asked out this really cute guy from church, and ended up marrying him.”
1. Prior Negative Experiences
“I grew up knowing I wanted to wait…But one or two ‘not-good-for-me-but-I-really-want-to-like-me boys’ later, and I decided to have sex.
Yes, it was fun. Yes, I liked it. But when those relationships ended, it compounded the pain of those break-ups so much more than it had been in previous break-ups.
I have since decided that the next time I have sex will be after I get married. Not because of guilt or shame. I’m waiting because I’ve learned that my heart is valuable and is worth protecting.”
Everyone has the freedom to decide whether or not they will have sex or when. It’s just as important to support people who decide they want to wait, while we work to empower sexually active people to take precautions and stay safe.
What do you think of these reasons? Did you wait? Our comments section can totally handle stories or ideas you want to share about this.