It’s time to get real, folks.

No more messing around, no more beating around the bush.

The tweets you’re about to read are the straight dope on married life. We’re going to explore the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of being hitched.

Oh, and these tweets about being married also happen to be HILARIOUS, so we can all actually enjoy them!

Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you with that ominous introduction…my bad.

Let’s have some laughs about the institution of marriage!

1. They’re still in the same place!

How many times do we have to go over this?!?!

2. Don’t even think about it.

You want to keep that hand, don’t you?


3. Can you stop breathing for a while?

I’d really appreciate that. Thanks.

4. How dare you cross the threshold.

I’ve warned you for the last time.

5. It’s time to debrief each other.

Let’s go back to 3:38 a.m.

6. That’s way over the line.

Who is this monster?

7. You’re wrong. Again.

Was there ever any doubt?

8. She really gets you.

This is true love, people.

9. The answer is NO.

And don’t ask again.

10. Can we please talk about this some other time?

I don’t need this in my life right now.

11. What are you doing here?

The same thing you are, I guess…

12. Why did you do that?

You might need a weekend away by yourselves…

Okay, now we want to hear from you.

Yeah, you!

In the comments, tell us how you’re holding up during the pandemic with your significant other. Please and thank you!