It can be hard not to get sucked into the vortex of negativity that surrounds a lot of us sometimes.
So what do you do when everyone you encounter is rude and negative and you feel it starting to get to you, as well?
You do the exact opposite! Or, at least you should try to…
AskReddit users opened up about why they choose to be kind to people…even when they don’t get it in return.
1. Yes.
“It’s simple.
I just think you shouldn’t make anyone else’s life harder than it already is.”
2. Everyone’s going through something.
“Life is HARD. People go through s**t.
Also, having less empathy is often genetic, neurological, mental health, and gut bacteria related. (There should be consequences for hurtful behavior and actions, but people themselves are a f**king mess of complications). I don’t need people to be kind to me, because I have a lot of beauty in my life.
I want everyone else to enjoy the beauty in their lives, too, even with the struggles. I want them to thrive alongside the pain. I want them to be as happy and well as possible. I don’t want anyone to be stuck in suffering because life is short, and the reasons you may be a d**k are complex.
Your life is happening right now. It’s passing by. What beauty is passing by that you just don’t see? Can I make your path a bit more beautiful with a little kindness?”
3. Easy.
“My number one piece of advice for travellers is to learn how to at least say Hello and Thank You in the language of the place you’re traveling.
It’s amazing how much it lights peoples’ faces up and increases their willingness to be helpful and welcome you in.
And it’s such a simple, low barrier. Thank You is like a magic key in life.”
4. Relentlessly positive.
“The world is often sh**ty and people are often selfish.
So I’m relentlessly positive and friendly even when others abuse it.
I’m not letting s**tty people gaslight me into being like them.”
5. Armor.
“It’s like armor in a way, if you refuse to be annoyed.
The people that are sh**ty to you on purpose are also more annoyed when you just ignore it and continue to be pleasant.
When they escalate it to get a rise out of you, they look like even more of a d**k to everyone.”
6. I like this.
“Practicing radical kindness means assuming the best of everyone— heart- seeing them— and then acting toward them with compassion, patience, and humility.
It means infusing what we think, say, and do through- out the day with warmth, understanding, and care. It means treating everyone— including ourselves!”
7. This is good.
“I try not to reproduce behavior that I don‘t like in other people.
It makes me like myself more.”
8. Do it for Mom.
“My mother. She was the nicest person I’ve ever known she was respectful, kind and nice to everyone even the ones who were mean to her.
She committed s**cide in April of 2019, and it made me really question life at the time.
I think of her and aspire to be that level of kindness, I guess it reminds me of her whenever I see I’ve made someone smile.”
9. Don’t give it to them.
“I avoided being bu**ied by being nice and funny. It was my defense mechanism for scary situations.
For the most part I wanted to be left alone with my small group of friends, and diffusing situations by being pleasant seemed to work.
A**holes love a good fight, don’t give it to them.”
10. Just be nice.
“It just never hurts to be nice.
You don’t know what people go through or how long it’s been since someone said something or did nice for someone, so I do my part to reset the clock on that.
I remember holding the door for a guy one time when he was like 20 feet behind me, and he was so appreciative that someone did something for him that sounded like he was about to tear up.
You just never know, so why not be a good person?”
11. This is good.
“”When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That’s the message he is sending.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh.”
12. Read this.
“I try to embody this mindset so much.
Being a dwarf, I get a lot of s**t from people: shouting on the street, pointing, people filming me and taking photos of me, asking me invasive questions, generally making rude statements about me or expressing weird assumptions.
It gets tiring and sometimes downright upsetting, for sure, but I never want to let that feed into how I interact with people in general. As soon as I am a d**k to someone preemptively, without cause, I have just ruined an opportunity to have a positive new connection in my life. People can and will often surprise you, and even people who may seem ignorant or rude at first can change dramatically if I don’t just shut them down from the offset.
There is a line, of course. If someone is a complete unapologetic a** – f**k them. I’m not against standing up for myself and I have had to cut ties with people before, but in milder situations, people have the capacity to change and it’s kind of wasted potential to not encourage that, whether it is through empathy or kindness.
I used to let all of this get to me. I would be so angry and miserable, every day. I hated everyone. But eventually, I realised that empathising with people is a win for both parties: understanding where a person is coming from (not excusing it, but understanding it) made me less angry, and in turn allowed for them to not get defensive or aggressive like they would if they were just pegged as a monster.
Eventually, empathy just became easier. It made me happier, and it took less of a toll on my mindset.”
How about you?
Do you choose to be kind to people even if they don’t reciprocate?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know!