Most of us have used Amazon in some capacity, and that’s because Jeff Bezos knows exactly how to take our money.
But we can fight back against the always-grinning, cash-devouring capitalist cardboard monster known as Jeffy with some snappy, and delightful, personal reviews on the products we purchase from his behemoth of a website.
Let’s check out some of the best examples…
1. Morgan Freeman narrates…
“Ahhh, yes, the mighty man-wolves of Wall street. Fueled on designer drugs and delicious penny stocks. Very beautiful, very powerful.”
2. Math is hard, dude.
2(b) or not 2(b)=?
3. Dammit, Janet.
I can still hear you in my soul.
4. That art degree, tho.
Currently cutting it as a sandwich artist. And blog writer. You want that toasted?
5. A barrel of fun.
Shove that in your Keystone pipeline.
6. Shoulda’ bought the Dutch oven.
But I’m fine with the bag of precooked beans.
7. There’s a joke here.
I’m not the one to make it.
8. One-ply is just as bad.
Whoa, ah hot! Hot, hot, hot. Hothothothot.
9. The geese are dead, Karen.
I SAID THE GEESE ARE DEAD, KAREN!
10. 10/10 would roll down this hill again.
Only in these pants–and only in every other color.
11. “When was the last time we played Nightcrawlers?”
Only with the good lube, Charlie.
12. Hey, girl.
13. I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready.
Catching some DoodleBob vibes here. Me hoy minoy, amma’ right?
14. Certified rotten.
As a friend and influencer.
15. Swing away.
I know a fairy that would pay for a swing or two with that for a handful of change.
Reviews are important because they give a company or service an accurate and firsthand account of their product or service, so don’t ever stop with the accurate accounts of such things. If you know what I mean.
Do you have a funny review story, tell us about it in the comments!