I’ve said it before and I’ll said it again: there are so many hilarious women out there that it can be hard to keep up with all the comedy. That’s especially true on Twitter.
That’s why we gather up these tweets so you can see the best of the best AND you can start following these funny gals so you’ll never miss another joke. You’re welcome!
Let’s take a look…
1. I hear you on that one.
But hey, don’t hate on sleep!
I talk a lot of shit for someone who has to be in bed by 9:30.
— Sassparilla (@Megatronic13) September 12, 2019
2. I’d go check it out.
That’s actually a dope layout!
I’ve just convinced my mate that the inside of a cheese grater is in fact, a sick new nightclub pic.twitter.com/CQO75l8xvB
— The Dating Diaries (@justahiddenjem) October 3, 2019
3. Send it over here.
Because I want all the cheese, all the time, and keep it coming!
[at a restaurant]
woman: and i’ll have that without cheese
me: *leaning my entire body into the waiters line of sight from a neighboring table* i’ll have her cheese
— erin chack (@ErinChack) October 2, 2019
4. This is amazing.
I wonder what she’d do if you let her in. I don’t think it would be anything good.
my italian mother telling us a story at thanksgiving dinner pic.twitter.com/PeF65QFLlV
— kim (@KimmyMonte) September 30, 2019
5. My mom did spend a lot of time on the phone in the ’80s.
I mean, if they WERE talking about shoulder pads, that would be a completely appropriate use of time.
in the 1980’s our moms were literally always on the phone with someone what tf were they always talking about, magnum p.i.? shoulder pads ?
— pony starwars (@tigersgoroooar) September 28, 2019
6. Conserving energy, okay?
Oh… I like this explanation.
I’m not lazy I’m energy efficient
— Shenanigans (@Shenanigans_luv) September 30, 2019
7. Went downhill fast.
Kid… you’re just walking. CALM DOWN.
Been together since 4pm, no problems. I go to the bathroom ONCE 45 seconds in, and I have to rush out to this: pic.twitter.com/AN1iaZYe2k
— Madeline (@madelaneeee) September 27, 2019
8. Time to pay that fee.
But shouldn’t these things be free? Seriously.
buying a pregnancy test is just paying a late fee for your period
— Kie (@KielyHealey) October 4, 2019
9. I need to see the proof.
And no, a Twitter account is not proof.
please present the signed permission slip from your therapist before approaching me romantically
— mary beth (@marybethbarone) October 3, 2019
10. I see it. Do you?
I mean, I know it’s not real… but it’s still hilarious.
Conspiracy theory: Shia LaBeouf lost his passion in acting and purpose in life so he hibernated for a couple years and came back as a rapper with face tattoos named Post Malone. pic.twitter.com/3AGLsSIyzZ
— Hannah Berner (@beingbernz) September 17, 2019
See what I’m talking about? Hilarious stuff. And it keeps coming and coming and coming…
What are you faves? Share them with us in the comments! Or we won’t be friends any longer…