Parents have a knack for finding their kids in all sorts of ridiculous situations.
Maybe it’s because a lot of kids are usually doing things they shouldn’t be doing or that are totally embarrassing.
Hey, we were all kids once, so these posts should make a lot of sense.
Here are some pretty hilarious stories from people on AskReddit.
Just so you know, some of these are NSFW.
1. Don’t say a word.
“I bought a VHS video camera. Saved up money for so long to buy it from a dirty wee second hand shop.
I came home one day to find my mum had been, and still was recording episodes of daytime TV shit, over my hours and hours (and hours) of masturbatory action.
No words spoken. Ever.”
2. A lot to unpack.
“One time my mother walked in on my girlfriend and I having sex, to tell me that my father cut his finger off, and that they were going to hospital.
There was a lot to unpack in that moment.”
3. Sorry, dad.
“But my dad walked in my room right after me and my gf got done doing the deed. I was standing, facing the door, cleaning myself up.
His only word was WIENER, while covering his eyes and shutting the door.”
4. Some things never change…
“I’m female. When I was 4 my mom caught me trying to sit backwards on the toilet.
When I was 37, she walked in my room and found me passed out mid-masturbation with porn playing. She turned off the porn.
Thanks mom.”
5. Let’s have a talk.
“I don’t know why but as a kid I would put my hand in my pants because it felt warm in there (not for any other reason.) it happen unintentionally sometimes.
One morning I woke up to my parents looking at me concerned, I was confused until I looked down. As you can guess my hand was in my pants, and I immediately took them out.
My parents were crying laughing but I was so embarrassed.
That night my mom gave me the talk.”
6. Contest time!
“When we were about 6 years old me and a friend were having a contest seeing who could pee the furthest out the third-story window.
Some nosy lady from across the street ratted us out to his parents… I still think I won but we didn’t get a chance to check who peed the furthest.”
7. That’s amazing.
“Not so much caught but occured in plain sight.
I sleep-walked into a living room cocktail party and peed into a bowl of chips in front of a dozen adults.”
8. Not a smart move.
“Well masturbating…unfortunately more than once.
I had a glass door when I lived with my parents.
WHY THE HECK DO YOU GIVE A TEENAGE BOY A FREAKING GLASS DOOR?!”
9. Ouch!
“When I was four I wrapped my two year old brother’s penis in masking tape because he said it was “broken”. He started crying as the head turned purple.
I ran down stairs, grabbed a screw driver and our mom walked in just seconds before I was about to make my brother part of a boys choir forever.”
10. Hahahaha. Wow!
“I found my moms vibrator and was mixing eggs with it…also shells.
Licked it and everything…”
11. Need someone to talk to.
“I grew up alone. I used to talk to myself. When I was 10-12 I would often talk myself out of dark situations.
My mom would walk in and ask me who I was talking to bc I didnt have a phone to call anyone.
I’m now 16 and I’ve had 3 physiologic evaluations to see if I’m a threat to myself or anyone else. I’m not. I’m just really lonely sometimes and have no one to talk to.”
12. Oh, no!
“Using my little sisters toy cucumber as a dildo.
I was a fucking weird 13 year old and still cringe at it.”
13. Learning the hard way.
“My mom didn’t really do a great job telling me about sex. (She gave me a book called Suzie’s Babies about a classroom hamster published in 1950-something, took me on a weekend trip listening to a tape series by a pastor about puberty, etc….)
I went to private Christian school my whole life but went to my local community college for my first two years of university. My first day on campus a girl I had never met and excitedly told me EVERY detail of her date and the sexual experience is therein from the night before. I was shocked, not so much by how bold she was but by how little I understood.
This was about 2005, so I promptly went home, sat down at our family desktop and typed “sex” in the search bar. You can imagine what the links I found took me to. I logged off and moved on.
Weeks later, my mom and dad meet me at the top of the stairs in front of the computer when I get home from work. My mother is angrily weeping. Long story short my mother accused me of having a pornography addiction, which is hilarious considering that I didn’t even know what pornography was.
It ended in an argument and her being hurt that our puberty trip wasn’t more special to me than it was to her, and my father telling me that if I had any questions I could ask him.
I’m surprisingly well-adjusted to the non-Christian bubble and sex and my husband and I plan to be very honest and straightforward about sex with our kids so they don’t associate shame with it like my mom did.”
14. Uncomfortable.
“Trying to see if my penis was long enough that I could suck it.
I couldn’t.”
15. Oh, boy…
“Two memories come to mind.
The first one was when I was 6 or so. I was a fairly curious child and one day I took a giant poop. After I cleaned up, I decided to get a pair of gloves and dissect my poop to see what all was in it. My mom caught me and gave me hell about it all the way through adulthood.
The second was when I had my first serious boyfriend over. I was 16 and my sister was 3 or 4. Being a little kid, she always wanted to come into my room. My curious little sister was the only reason I was allowed to close my bedroom door when he was over. My boyfriend and I decided to fool around and pushed my beanbag in front of the door to slow down any intruders.
Well, I wind up on my knees with his dick in my mouth and lo and behold here comes my Mom opening the door. She couldn’t get the door opened all the way, but she saw enough. The next morning when she was driving me to school she said very awkwardly, “honey, please don’t put your beanbag in front of the door anymore”.”
Now it’s your turn!
In the comments, please tell us about the worst thing your parents caught you doing when you were a kid.
We can’t wait to hear from you!
