Most of us have used Amazon in some capacity, and that’s because Jeff Bezos knows exactly how to take our money.
But we can fight back against the always-grinning, cash-devouring capitalist cardboard monster known as Jeffy with some snappy, and delightful, personal reviews on the products we purchase from his behemoth of a website.
Let’s check out some of the best examples…
1. Morgan Freeman narrates…
“Ahhh, yes, the mighty man-wolves of Wall street. Fueled on designer drugs and delicious penny stocks. Very beautiful, very powerful.”
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/d5b4et
2. Math is hard, dude.
2(b) or not 2(b)=?
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/dblv4q
3. Dammit, Janet.
I can still hear you in my soul.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/f2xw7f
4. That art degree, tho.
Currently cutting it as a sandwich artist. And blog writer. You want that toasted?
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/dx8t8x
5. A barrel of fun.
Shove that in your Keystone pipeline.
6. Shoulda’ bought the Dutch oven.
But I’m fine with the bag of precooked beans.
7. There’s a joke here.
I’m not the one to make it.
I love when reviewers post photos
byu/F-this inamazonreviews
8. One-ply is just as bad.
Whoa, ah hot! Hot, hot, hot. Hothothothot.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/f1mmm6
9. The geese are dead, Karen.
I SAID THE GEESE ARE DEAD, KAREN!
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/e01knv
10. 10/10 would roll down this hill again.
Only in these pants–and only in every other color.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/jfzlfc
11. “When was the last time we played Nightcrawlers?”
Only with the good lube, Charlie.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/cztm4b
12. Hey, girl.
Nice leg…gings
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/ie9pif
13. I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready.
Catching some DoodleBob vibes here. Me hoy minoy, amma’ right?
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/fmbh8g
14. Certified rotten.
As a friend and influencer.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/j4k61g
15. Swing away.
I know a fairy that would pay for a swing or two with that for a handful of change.
https://www.reddit.com/r/amazonreviews/comments/e8tnvy
Reviews are important because they give a company or service an accurate and firsthand account of their product or service, so don’t ever stop with the accurate accounts of such things. If you know what I mean.
Do you have a funny review story, tell us about it in the comments!