Walmart is such a uniquely American place…and I don’t necessarily know if that’s a good thing…
You know what I’m talking about, right?
I think you do…
AskReddit users talked about the people you can find at EVERY Walmart.
Let’s have a look.
1. Classy.
“Skin colored leggings.
My husband calls those flesh pants.”
2. Everyone’s here!
“People having an entire fu**ing family reunion in the middle of the one aisle you need to go down, that then act like you’re the pr**k for saying excuse me.”
3. Where are they?
“Someone dressed in camouflage.
They have to reveal themselves to pay… If they pay.”
4. Oh, boy…
“The guy in the automotive section who looks like he’s eaten nothing but crystal m**h for the last five years.”
5. Far, far away.
“The person who takes it as a challenge to put their shopping cart back anywhere but the cart corral.
Leave it in the middle of the parking lot, the ditch, three blocks away…”
6. Sounds interesting.
“Rural goth.
Faded dyed blue hair with 4 week old roots showing. Cookie Monster pajama pants.
Black t-shirt from hot topic with a band like Slayer on it. Black fingernail paint that is about 3 weeks old.”
7. Out there somewhere.
“A crying baby.
You never see the baby, you only hear it from another aisle.”
8. Seen it!
“A barefoot toddler with dirty feet, a nose that needs to be wiped, wearing a t shirt and a full diaper.
Bonus points if it’s after 10:00 pm.”
9. The Walmart Karen.
“Older lady with sandals and overgrown toenails on the motorized cart with the front basket full of attitude and entitlement.”
10. All business.
“A busy, huffy individual who is doing the biggest shop you have ever seen in your life. They might be spending $200-$300 in one visit.
They don’t want to be around the “regulars.” It’s all business for them. They know this is the cheapest way to shop.
They want to get in, get their goods for the month, and get out.”
11. A regular.
“You can only find her between 10am and 6am, but the granny in slippers and a nightgown over bed clothes.
Sometimes curlers, sometimes a haircap, sometimes just free. Frequently will start shuffling while leaning over a cart due to back issues and fatigue.
Don’t know what she needs that’s so d**ned important at that time of night/morning, but she’s a Wal-Mart frequent flyer for sure!”
12. She’ll be paying.
“A wiry white guy with a shaved head and bad teeth, prison tats and a d**d-eyed stare.
He is radiating seething violence and moves in a jerky, unpredictable way. Sometimes he has sores from scratching at invisible bugs.
His girlfriend pays for everything.”
13. One track mind.
“Customers with tunnel vision. They literally wouldn’t see a truck coming at them when they are looking for the cat food.
I am a contractor and I do a lot of work in Walmarts. I have been up on a scissor lift, wearing a hard hat and had customers ask me where they could find toothpaste. Why would they think that I am an employee?
The last time that happened I said let me look and I pretended that I was on a ship and raised my hand to my forehead to shield the sun from my eyes and scanned the store from my vantage point.”
Now it’s your turn.
Tell us what you think in the comments.
We can’t wait to hear from you!