Sometimes kids need a reality check. And who better to give it to them than their parents?
And that’s exactly what this father did when he decided to teach his two adult children a lesson about working and making money.
But now he’s having some second thoughts and thinks he might have been too harsh…
Let’s see what he had to say on Reddit’s “Am I the *sshole?” page…
AITA for telling my kids that they aren’t getting a penny from me when I die if they don’t shape up?
“I (57M) have two kids, N(30M) and A(27F). N works part-time flipping burgers, but insists his real job is as a gaming streamer.
A claims she’s a ‘professional’ influencer, her livelihood supported by her bf. My kids are adults, what they do with their lives is their choice. We’ve had several arguments about it, but ultimately, as adults, the responsibility for their lives is their own.
Over Christmas, we were talking about their mother (on zoom) when A brought up the subject of her will, wondering if she’d left anything to them. I confessed that she passed before ever writing one, and the money she did have was used up the year she passed.
We were a dual-income family in a time when neither of us were making a lot. It was a hard time. Eventually, I joined a friend in the private sector and my fortune changed. I’m not ‘rich’, but I’ll never be uncomfortable again.
Well, N then decided to ‘lighten the mood’ by implying that I’ll make up for it when I pass. I asked him what he meant, and the conversation went as followed:
Me: What do you mean?
N: Well, you have a lot of money, right? It’ll go to us.
Me: And who told you that?
A: What do you mean?
Me: I’ve made it very clear that I don’t approve of the way you both live. You both chose not to get an education or real jobs. You have no way of supporting yourself. (I often buy them groceries).
You refuse to help yourselves, so why would I enable your ‘lifestyles’ by leaving you my savings when I die? You want my money, then grow up and get real jobs, but the bank of dad will be forever closed when dad is forever closed.
What followed was a heated argument where both N and A accused me of being manipulative and unsupportive, so I got real with them.
Me: You both refuse to grow up. Flipping burgers is an honourable job, but it’s not going to keep a roof over your head. What if you have kids? What if you get fired? And (A), what will you do if your boyfriend breaks up with you because all you do is sit on your *ss all day and take photos of yourself?
You want to do that, find a modelling agency. A real job. You both speak of chasing your dreams, but neither one of you are in any position to do that because neither of you wants to take responsibility for yourselves right now. I’ve said it a million times. You’re adults.
What you do with your lives is your choice and your responsibility. Dreams take money, and neither of you have that. Grow up. Get a job. A real job. Then chase your dreams. I’m not going to leave a penny to either of you if your life plan is to ‘get by’ until I die, then coast through the rest of your lives off the earnings of my hard work.
N ended the call after a prolonged silence. A called me an AH then did the same. I haven’t heard from either since, and neither will take my calls.
So, AITA here? I think I might be because I was unnecessarily harsh on Christmas.”
Let’s see how folks on Reddit responded…
This person said that this dad is not in the wrong in any way, shape, or form because that money is all his and he earned it.
Another reader said that his kids really need to grow up and get serious because he’s only 57-years-old and has a lot of living left to do.
This Reddit user talked about how this man’s kids are totally unrealistic and he did the right thing by putting them in their place.
A reader said that he can relate to this guy’s situation because his brother is totally irresponsible when it comes to money and work.
Finally, this person said that everyone is to blame in this situation.
And dad should have made his kids realize this is how it was gonna be a looong time ago.
Do you think this dad went overboard in his actions or was he doing the right thing?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know.
Thanks a lot!