Parents, tell me is this basically sums up your life right now: there’s nowhere to run and nowhere to hide and you and your kiddos are driving each other up the wall…and you’re considering altering your appearance and making a run for the border to e
Okay, maybe not that last part, but I’m willing to bet that this whole shutdown is making things a little bit tense around the house. How else could it possibly be when you’re around each other pretty much 24/7, am I right?
And if you DON’T have kids yet but you want them, just take a look at these tweets from parents before you take the plunge.
That’s all we’re saying…
Let’s get started…
1. What a cute kid.
Actually…on second thought…
As I hugged my 3yo she looked up into my eyes, kissed my cheek and said ‘mummy I don’t think it’s fair you have more hair on your chin than daddy has on his head’
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) July 16, 2020
2. I have a splitting headache!
How many times have you heard this?
He died doing what he loved: Lying down with a “headache” at 5 pm after his wife had been home alone with two kids all day.
-My husband’s epitaph, probably
— Unexpected SAHM (@UnexpectedSAHM) July 16, 2020
3. Funny how that works.
But it always ends up that way.
A typical cup holds about 8 ounces of liquid.
But if a child spills it, that number increases to 8 gallons.
— A Bearer Of Dad News ✊? (@HomeWithPeanut) July 13, 2020
4. You can’t win!
You’re always worrying, one way or the other…
Having a toddler is so confusing.
I’m constantly wishing she’ll be quiet. Then, when she’s quiet I’m hoping she will make some noise so I know she’s not doing something crazy like burning the house down or eating cotton.
— Jordyn Armour (@survivingmommy_) July 15, 2020
5. It’s a miracle!
But it’ll be one of your kids soon enough…
I can hear a kid screaming outside and it’s not one of mine so it looks like miracles really can happen
— ThreeTimeDaddy (@threetimedaddy) July 15, 2020
6. These are the top three.
Which one do you fear the most?
Worst ways to die
1. Burned alive
3. Die from frustration teaching your child to blow their nose
— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) July 15, 2020
7. Not a productive summer…
If we’re being honest…
As homeschooling draws to a close for the summer I realise my 8yo may not have learned how to do fractions but he also learned very little about anything else
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) July 15, 2020
8. Let’s go over the plan.
Do you really think they’re this organized?
Pretty sure all my kids have a quick briefing before I wake up where the 3yo gives everyone a PowerPoint presentation on how to make me lose my shit before 8am.
— Marcy G (@BunAndLeggings) July 14, 2020
9. Pretty much.
Better than no tan at all, I guess.
Beach body just means tan lines in the shape of my toddler
— Unexpected SAHM (@UnexpectedSAHM) July 15, 2020
10. This is a tricky one.
What do YOU think?
Which one is higher?
a) number of bricks in the Great Wall of China
b) number of stars in the sky
c) number of digits in π
d) number of times my 3 year old says he’s hungry after he’s just eaten dinner
— ThreeTimeDaddy (@threetimedaddy) July 14, 2020
11. This is very important.
Now you better have a good explanation ready.
Me: night sweetie
8: night mummy
Me: love you
8: love you
Me: sweet dreams
Me:*goes to door*
Me:*puts one foot over threshold*
Me: oh for f- is it important sweetie
Me: whats up
8: if you’re born in the middle of the ocean, where are you from
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) July 16, 2020
12. Oh, no!
Let’s hope it’s Option A.
The defining moment of my parenting career is right here, right now, as I wonder if this sore throat is because I’ve yelled at my kids all day, or because the ‘Rona finally found me.
— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) July 14, 2020
13. Watch your language.
You know they’re gonna pick up on everything you say.
My kids heard me yell “twat waffle” last night and have requested them for breakfast with a side of bacon.
— Maryfairyboberry??♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) July 13, 2020
14. What kind of parent are you?
You should learn from the best.
If you’re not using Barbie and Ken to make passive aggressive comments to your husband while you play with your kid, are you even married?
— Mommy Uncensored (@amomuncensored) July 15, 2020
Now we want to hear from you!
In the comments, tell us how your kids have been behaving during this crazy time.
We can’t wait to hear what you have to say! Thanks in advance!