Uh oh…just by the title alone you know that this story is probably gonna be pretty ugly…

Because anytime someone is called “lazy”, there are bound to be some hurt feelings…

And that goes extra when it’s someone you’re about to get married to!

Take a look at this story a man shared on Reddit and stick around to see how readers reacted.

AITA for calling my fiancee lazy for wanting to be a stay-at-home wife?

“I’m (42m) am engaged to who I feel is “the one” (33f) – we had been dating for just over 3 years and I proposed last month.

last night – after another session of wedding planning, my fiancee asked if I would be alright with her being a stay-at-home wife. at first, I laughed because I thought she was joking, but she was being very serious. she told me not to laugh and said she wants to be a stay-at-home wife.

I asked her why as we both make pretty good money at our jobs, and we can’t afford our current lifestyle with just one income. she says it’s because I make a lot more (which is true, I make about 40% more) than her and we could scale back our lifestyle – and said “it’s been on my mind a lot – I think working 9-5 just isn’t for me” I asked her if she was being serious, and she confirmed that she is.

I said that I’m not comfortable with that idea, and said maybe if we have kids she could be a stay-at-home mom but I’m not cool with her being a stay-at-home wife. and she said that I was being “manipulative”. since we’re both child-free. but I just said that as a hypothetical – since I’m not at all okay with being the sole ‘bread-winner”.

that divulged into a pretty heated argument. with her saying that I should “support her dreams” (she never stated what she wants to do with her staying at home, even though I did ask) so this is where I may be the a**hole – in the heat of the moment I said “where is this coming from, why is it your dream to be a stay-at-home wife? is it your dream to be lazy?”

she got really upset at that, and had gone to her mothers and said “we’ll talk more when you calm down”

I’ll be real here, I don’t want her to be a stay at home wife, I’m not okay with being the sole breadwinner, and I do not wish to support this “dream” – I want a partner in life, not a dependent doing nothing productive with their days.


Check out what Reddit users had to say about this story.

This reader said that this guy was not wrong for what he said. At all.

Photo Credit: Reddit

Another Reddit user said that maybe her friends are pushing her in this direction…

Photo Credit: Reddit

One person laid it out for this man: he better be prepared for a rough reality if he goes along with her plan.

Photo Credit: Reddit

And lastly, this person suggested that the man’s wife-to-be might be having some kind of mental health issue and that the couple needs to talk this over in depth.

Photo Credit: Reddit

What do you think?

Did this guy act like a jerk?

Tell us what you think in the comments!