Thank God I live in the era of spell check. Otherwise I’d have to like, check my own spelling.
It would never work. No one would ever communicate with me. I’d be alone, in a corner, eating crackers.
What is the most damage you’ve ever done with a typo? from AskReddit
But even spell check can’t always save us from ourselves, especially when it does battle with autocorrect. Just listen to these Reddit tales.
1. Very Bad News
A couple years ago my grandpa had surgery for pancreatic cancer.
What my mom MEANT to text me is “the surgeons will give an update soon” which instead somehow came out as “the surgeons will give up soon”
2. Definite Articles
A friend of mine once showed me a story they were working on, and I accidentally sent them a message saying “this is s**t” instead of “this is the s**t.”
Fortunately they understood it was just a mistake and I was able to clear the whole thing up in like a minute.
3. Well There’s Your Problem
Asked a co-worker in a group IM if he’d mind me using his d**k as mine didn’t seem to be working properly.
I meant dock, for my laptop.
It wasn’t something I got in trouble for but it’s one of those typo’s that will probably come up in conversation for the next several years.
4. Vampires Beware
This probably isn’t the most damaging here, but was funny. Wife ordered groceries via an app. Wanted 2 heads of garlic.
Ordered 2kg or garlic. Shopper didn’t stop to think about it.
It was like 40 heads. A huge shopping bag just full of garlic.
5. Mommy Issues
More of a “how I got screwed by autocorrect”, but I was s*xting a girl and she sent me a pic of her boobies.
H**l yeah right, so I text back “oh mmm”, except my iPhone really thought I wanted to say “oh mom”…Yeah, she went wtf and then ghosted me lol
Years ago I took down the entire web infrastructure of a large (millions of daily users) company with a single additional . in a line of PHP code.
Does that count?
7. Butt Shows
Several years ago, I asked my mom if we could go to “butt shows” that weekend. I meant “buy shoes.”
No joke, it changed BOTH words to form the most unfortunate sentence ever. I hate my fat thumbs, lol.
8. Always Take a Second
I mistyped ‘regards’ on an angrily worded email. I was told by my manager that, no matter how annoyed I was, I should call people that. It’s hard to explain that it was an accident given the tone of the email.
Always take a second and proof read any angry email. And then don’t send it. It isn’t worth it.
9. Vowel Movements
I once sent a mass email to Sr. VP’s and C level execs that I was going to shut down the server cluster over the weekend.
A half hour later, a guy stops me in the hallway and tells me that I sent an email to all these big shots that I was going to ‘s**t down the server cluster.’ LOL.
I also sent a message where I was asked to look at a problem and sent a message to a bunch of managers and VP’s that I would ‘investigate things’ except that it said that I would ‘investigate thongs.’ LOL.
Whoever put the ‘u’, ‘i’, and ‘o’ keys next to each other on a qwerty keyboard, well played. This is the best practical joke ever devised.
10. Dead Serious
Once when I was about 14-15 I was working for an art gallery and the owner had me write a happy birthday email to her friend. In hindsight, that’s pretty weird, but anyway.
I accidentally wrote ‘happy birthday dead Christina’, instead of dear, and when Christina responded, it was clear that she found the typo humorous. My boss, however, did not, and she flipped out on me and made me cry over it.
She then had me write an apology email explaining things like who I was, how old I was, and where I went to school.
That was over a decade ago, and looking back, everything about that was super inappropriate. I was very happy to stop working there.
11. Out to Sea
Not mine but a coworker.
They were in Iraq and they order stuff for mechanics, well there was a typo from his shop and they received a 5 ton sea anchor delivered to them. No one checked what the NSN was ordering and just hit OK all the way up the chain lol.
I sent out a bio for a huge presentation I was giving on how to navigate virtual communications in which I wrote I had “vast experience with pubic speaking.”
13. The Experiment
One of my professor from University was very strict and she would reduce marks If assignments were late, even for minutes. I had experience in past were I submitted the assignment but forgot to hand in Google classroom (Where you upload the assignment but there is an extra button to hand in to teacher).
For one of such assignments I was back home and about to catch a train for an overnight journey to college, so I had to submit the assignment that night before I go to station. I was in hurry but somehow managed to submit the assignment on time. Fast forward, reached college the next day. Everyone was talking about who all submitted in time and all, proud me who submitted it in time just opened it in Google classroom to send it to my friends.
I froze for a moment because the heading was S*XPERIMENT in BOLD, font size 16 as heading , In hurry I pressed ctrl+ s a couple of times but somehow an extra S came in front of EXPERIMENT..
14. The Infinite Loop
I was an intern at a gov’t agency and I was running a model on the same server that was hosting the 10k employees email… And my model had an infinite loop because I missed a closing tag.
Anywho the server went down in a horrible fashion and someone came to my desk (cause there was no email) and said, “are you ___ ____?”
Then said “come with me” and I got scolded pretty bad
15. Deck the Halls
Texted my boss “come meet me on the d**k, I f**ked and need you”
Meant to text
Come meet me on the deck, I f**ked up and need you
I guess autocorrect knows I type d**k alot more than deck, it was also super sunny outside and I couldn’t read my screen well enough to realize my mistake until he came up and laughed at me
Be careful out there.
What’s YOUR biggest typo problem?
Tell us in the comments.