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You gotta put people in their place sometimes…
When they deserve it!
Because if they don’t, you’re just acting like an a**hole if you embarrass them in front of other people.
And that brings us to today’s story: see if you think this woman was out of line for embarrassing someone…and let us know what you think in the comments.
AITA for embarrassing my BILs new wife in front of everyone?
“For context, it was not my intention but it was absolutely how it played out. My BIL (husband’s brother) was away for college for 4 years and ended up eloping with a women he had known for 7 months.
None of us knew her, not that it mattered. But we just met her for the first time back a few months ago. She seemed pleasant, a bit shy (which is to be expected) and a bit rough around the edges (no big deal at all but just like fidgety, darting her head and looking behind her shoulder like someone was standing there when no one was).
We found out a short few weeks later that she has bipolar, unmedicated, so her behaviors absolutely made sense (I’m an RN, as well as a social worker, and I also have bipolar but I’m medicated).
On Saturday MIL invited the whole family down for dinner and BIL and his new wife (Hannah) show up and we got to chatting at the dinner table about her diagnosis. She brought it up, not me (but she knew I knew about it so it started as small talk I believe).
Well it didn’t talk long for her to dive deep in to this conversation. Using her arms and hands to talk, getting a bit loud. No problems, the family is loud so she fits right in. But then she became angry, over nothing. Started saying stuff like “it absolutely f**king repulses me that people without bipolar try claiming they are manic when mania is strictly a bipolar thing”.
I wasn’t rude by any means but I did correct her, quietly, and said “actually mania comes in all forms and is not limited to bipolar disorders. Even people with brain tumors have been known to have manic episodes.” She immediately said I was wrong. That her doctor told her that it was strictly a bipolar thing, etc.
So I just stood firm and said “He’s wrong” and even pulled up my medical ebook to show her the paragraph that speaks on mania and everything that can cause an episode. She refused to read it so I just turned to my husband (who wasn’t paying attention to us) and said “Hunny, you’re a doctor, what causes manic episodes”.
He starts listing off multiple things, including manic depressive episodes, seasonal affective disorder, postpartum psychosis or schizoaffective disorder.
Well Hannah was p**sed. She immediately said that we were just trying to one up her and that she “knew what she was talking about”. My husband immediately said “obviously not if you’re going to sit here, argue and gatekeep symptoms of illnesses against two medical professionals.”
He then turned and walked off, leaving us at the table with both BILs, SIL and MIL looking on. Hannah then starts crying saying I embarrassed her on purpose for no good reason other than my pride and stormed out of the room after screaming for everyone to stop staring at her.
BIL is telling me I should have just shut my mouth and storms after her. I’m really confused if I’m the AH here.”
And here’s how folks reacted on Reddit.
This person said she’s NTA and the other woman took this too personally.
And this reader said people are tired of tiptoeing around this kind of stuff.
Another Reddit user said she shouldn’t have pressed her buttons…
What do you think about this story?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know!
Thanks a lot!