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I truly believe vegan are misunderstood. I’ve seen family and friends think that Vegan’s can simply make a change in their diet or that their reason for pursuing vegan-ism isn’t valid. It makes me sad that people choose not to understand the reason behind it. Or rather, just accept it! There needs to be no explanation! Okay, now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, here’s the story that burned me up.

A couple of big-time foodies decided to throw elaborate dinner parties for their close friends. How nice, right? They go allllll out. Multi-course meals, dinner settings for four to six people, wine, fancy feasts of meat and sides! Such a nice way to spend time with those you love.

But it’s apparent by this Reddit post on “Am I the A-Hole”, the chef in charge doesn’t like to be told to adjust the way he cooks, especially for his friend’s girlfriend Sarah.

Read it here:

AITA for not accommodating a vegan guest?

Longtime lurker here. Hoping some of you guys can weigh in on what has become a really frustrating situation with a close friend and his partner.

So my wife (29F) and I (29M) have been hosting dinner parties a few times a year for as long as we’ve lived in our current city. We like to go all out and cook elaborate multi-course meals, so we limit our invitations to just a few close friends, since cooking such a complex dinner is an all-day affair and the food costs add up quickly. We have about four to six people we invite to these events, depending on their availability, and it’s become a great tradition in our social circle.

Our friend James started dating his girlfriend Sarah about a year and a half ago, and when we first extended her an invitation, we were informed that Sarah was vegan. I thanked James for letting us know and said she was more than welcome to bring her own food so she would have something to eat. He agreed, and the two of them have been attending our parties regularly for the past year. Everything was fine, until now.

During our most recent dinner this past week, we noticed that Sarah was very quiet and looked like she was about to cry. My wife asked her what was wrong, but she told us not to worry about it and kept dodging the question, so we didn’t push the issue.

However, after the meal, James took us aside privately and told us that Sarah felt hurt because we never provided any dishes she could eat at our dinners and it seemed like we were deliberately excluding her. He added that he thought we were being rude and inconsiderate by not accommodating her, which really pissed me off, and we got into a huge argument over it.

My wife feels terrible that Sarah was so upset and apologized to her and James profusely, but I don’t agree that we did anything wrong. I like Sarah very much as a person and I don’t have anything against her dietary choices, but I don’t believe it’s fair to expect us to change our entire menu or make an entire separate meal for one person, especially when so much time and effort goes into creating these dinners. For the record, nobody else has any dietary restrictions.

AITA?

This dude starts out by looking for advice, truly wanting the Reddit users to back him up.

He starts with:

“So my wife (29F) and I (29M) have been hosting dinner parties a few times a year for as long as we’ve lived in our current city. We like to go all out and cook elaborate multi-course meals, so we limit our invitations to just a few close friends, since cooking such a complex dinner is an all-day affair and the food costs add up quickly. We have about four to six people we invite to these events, depending on their availability, and it’s become a great tradition in our social circle.”

Nice guy? Nope. Nope. Nope.

He actually told James to have Sarah bring her own food if she wanted to come.

“Our friend James started dating his girlfriend Sarah about a year and a half ago, and when we first extended her an invitation, we were informed that Sarah was vegan. I thanked James for letting us know and said she was more than welcome to bring her own food so she would have something to eat. He agreed, and the two of them have been attending our parties regularly for the past year. Everything was fine, until now.”

Was it fine, oh mighty chef? I think James and Sarah were playing nice.

But after a YEAR and A HALF of dating, you might want to invite her into the friend fold.

Just sayin’…

“During our most recent dinner this past week, we noticed that Sarah was very quiet and looked like she was about to cry. My wife asked her what was wrong, but she told us not to worry about it and kept dodging the question, so we didn’t push the issue.

However, after the meal, James took us aside privately and told us that Sarah felt hurt because we never provided any dishes she could eat at our dinners and it seemed like we were deliberately excluding her. He added that he thought we were being rude and inconsiderate by not accommodating her, which really pissed me off, and we got into a huge argument over it.”

Um, he was deliberately excluding her.

It’s like, “Hey, come over for dinner, but I’m not cooking for you.”

Some invitation!

And I’m not quite sure why this guy is the one that’s pissed off. I mean, James is your good friend, and this is his girl, soooooo….

“My wife feels terrible that Sarah was so upset and apologized to her and James profusely, but I don’t agree that we did anything wrong. I like Sarah very much as a person and I don’t have anything against her dietary choices, but I don’t believe it’s fair to expect us to change our entire menu or make an entire separate meal for one person, especially when so much time and effort goes into creating these dinners. For the record, nobody else has any dietary restrictions. AITA?”

Yes, Gordon Ramsay, you are the A-hole with a big meatless—I mean, heartless—side of pretentious.

And for the record is Sarah asking you to change your ENTIRE menu? Nope.

Perhaps pulling aside a few brussel sprouts (before adding bacon) would be nice. Or how about a big salad with fruit and nut toppings that you probably have on hand for your charcuterie tray.

See… it’s simple!

And hell, why not cook one meal that is all vegan? I swear you won’t die because you tried something new.

Now that I’m off my soap box, what do you think?