Uh oh…this could definitely go either way

Hey, to each their own, but I think being with ONE person is hard enough, so introducing other people into the mix?

You’re nuts!

But that’s just me…

Check out what AskReddit users had to say about how they’d respond if their partners suggested an open relationship.

Let’s get the details…

“Ask them who they want to f**k.

Unfortunately, this has happened to me before.

Should have ended it there, but I dragged it out a bit longer.”

Messed you up.

“Happened to me.

We were together for four years, and I thought we’d be together for fifty. Out of the blue, she proposed an open relationship, I thought about it but decided no, I couldn’t do it.

She cheated on me anyway. Looking back on it, I’m pretty sure she had already cheated and was just looking for a way to alleviate her guilt.

It f**ked me up for years. It just solidified my disdain for open relationships.”

Did it anyway.

“Partner had someone in mind already that she wanted us both to exclusively date and when we weren’t interested in each other and I didn’t want polyamory to be on the table at all until I was out of graduate school, they just went ahead with it anyway.

Crazy how that works!”


“My wife has a lot of medical issues, and at one point sex wasn’t really an option. She told me that I could have an open relationship on my end if I wanted.

My response was an immediate no.

I’m married to her. I love her. There isn’t anyone else in this world I’d rather be with than her, and that I would wait as long as she needed or indefinitely if that was the case. I am with her, not her v**ina.”

Too messy.

“My husband and I talked about it when my back first got screwed up, and between the pain and depression our previously overactive s** life was near non-existent. (no that’s not how I destroyed my back, directly)

And both of us had the same reservations. The idea of opening our relationship to having s** with another person could be something we could go for, if there was a guarantee that it would be sex only. That was something that we both felt could never be guaranteed.

You can’t help who you fall in love with. And since people are able to fall in love with more than one person, I believe it is completely logical that you can fall in love with a second person while still being in love with the first.

And that just makes things messy. Not to mention, the harm you might cause a third party of they are the one who fell in love with one of you. Nah, too messy.”

Didn’t happen.

“I suggested it to my partner a while back.

He has a very high s** drive, the medication I need to be on has lowered mine considerably. I wanted him to not resent me because I just didn’t want s** very much any more.

We very much thought about it, even to the point of making up rules and setting standards.

In the end he came to me and said he didn’t want to do it.”

One and done.

“I once asked what my spouse thought of ‘open marriages’.

Yeah… neither of us like that idea. It’s just not my idea of a good relationship at all.

I am a one woman guy and always will be.

If they would like any other man, or men than they can have them, just count me out of it. I couldn’t ever fathom that.”

Not into sharing.

“Husband and I had a similar conversation, with similar results, when my sister opened her marriage (and later closed it. That’s a tale and a half).

I don’t like to share my partner. Neither does husband. I don’t want anyone else and would feel hurt if he wanted anyone else. Monogamy is foundational to loyalty for us.

Open marriages can work for some folks if they’re not opened under duress (recipe for disaster right there), and the couple is not trying to conceive children while the marriage is opened (you want to ensure the chosen life partner rather than a temporary fling to be the father in that situation …).

Opening things seems to work better for middle aged swingers. Or for folks that have set up a relationship with these foundations in the first place.”

No time for that.

“He works all the time, I work all the time, we have two small children, his mother lives with us.

When exactly are either of us supposed to find time to date other people?!?!”

I’m trying to imagine how I’d actually feel emotionally if he asked me and my mind just keeps getting hung up on the logistics of it. We’re too tired, there’s no time, that would take way too much work, and that alone makes me not interested.

My initial reaction if he asked wouldn’t be ‘Who did you meet?’ but ‘Have you lost your mind? There are only 24 hours in a day!'”


“My ex asked for an open relationship.

I told her I’d rather not, she opened it up anyway.”

Now we want to hear from you.

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