I know I’m preaching to the choir here, but I’m just gonna tell you one more time: it’s probably not a great idea to mess with a woman on their wedding day…or in the months leading up to it.
Just trust us on this one, okay?
But, people are gonna be people and this woman made what some folks would consider to be a huge error in judgment…or maybe not…
Check out this story from the “Am I The A**hole?” page on Reddit.
AITA for wearing white as Maid of Honor while my friend is “the Bride”?
“My best friend Joy (28F) is getting married next year to her long time partner. Recently she started wedding planning and asked me (29F) to be her maid of honor—we have been friends for nearly 20 years and needless to say I was super excited.
Joy has started planning, and it’s been incredibly stressful for her. I have tried my best to be as supportive and helpful where I can, going above and beyond (daily discussions, fielding unwieldy family members, acting a buffer sometimes). I am prefacing with this because the next part is frankly bonkers and I am having trouble processing.
Last Sunday, Joy and I met with some of our friends for lunch (we are all vaccinated at this point). Since it was the first time seeing friends in a while and we were going to a nice restaurant, I decided to dress up a little.
It was pretty hot over the weekend so I opted to wear an old, white linen dress to our gathering (one I have worn many times). I thought everything was totally fine, but I noticed Joy giving me strange looks at lunch and only talking in short responses with me. I brushed it off as stress and when we got up to say goodbye, Joy left in a rush.
When I got home, I was had a bunch of angry texts from Joy saying she was disappointed in me and couldn’t believe I would try to “dull her shine during this special time”. I was confused asked her to elaborate. Apparently she was furious that I had dared to wear white while she was the bride to be.
I was FLOORED. I apologized (kind of) stating that I was sorry she was so upset, but that I wasn’t sure how my wearing white to a casual friends hang was a slight on her being a bride, nor how it was taking attention away from her. She flipped out and called me all sorts of names, and said she has no idea how she could have picked such an unsupportive and attention-grabbing MOH.
I snapped a little and told her that while I respected she was getting married, that did not entitle her on a monopoly on the color white and that while her wedding was the most important thing going on in her life, it was not the most important thing going on in other peoples lives.
Now I am aware that a bride generally wears white to wedding related events and the guests should not, but this brunch was not wedding related in the slightest. I feel especially sad since I feel that I have gone out of my way to help, and our past friendship has been very calm and loving.
My friends are generally supportive of me (a few think I should have somehow had the foresight to see this—apparently psychic abilities are another MOH requirement I missed) but think I should just try to make peace since she is clearly under a lot of stress. I do feel a bit bad, especially about the comment about her wedding not being the most important thing in my life, but am not budging.
Let’s see what folks on Reddit had to say about this.
This person said that, given the circumstances, this woman is not acting like a jerk.
Another reader said this is really a no-win situation for the woman and that she should just walk away.
This Reddit user said she should give the bride a chance to apologize and if she doesn’t, maybe it’s time to walk away.
And lastly, this person argued that the bride here is probably so overwhelmed with the planning of her wedding that she’s not really aware of how her behavior is affecting other people.
Do you think this woman acted inappropriately?
Talk to us in the comments and let us know.
We’d love to hear from you!