Uh oh…it sounds like it’s time to get weird!

Because we’re about to hear from AskReddit users about their darkest desires.

So buckle up, friends, and get started now!

1. Creepy!

“I wanna stare at someone from across the street then disappear when a bus passes.

The mind f**k is high with this one.”

2. A new life.

“To run away and never look back.

To cut all my relationships and start a new life.”

3. Sounds like a party.

“I kinda wanna steal a UPS car to open all these boxes they are delivering.

Like a big mystery box opening.”

4. Haunted house.

“I would never actually do this. But…

I really want a house, but I’m a poor person, so I concocted a plan to m**der the people in a house and then show up when it’s for sale. I figure a haunted house will be cheaper.

If I picked a house that’s too nice I may need to repeat to bring the price down. The realtor will say “you know.. there have been a lot of m**ders here..” and I’ll just have a secret smile, knowing I’ll be safe.”

5. Cave life.

“To live in a cave on the land of a rich man and be a hermit, occasionally paraded to guests for their amusement.”

6. Revenge.

“I have this fantasy where everyone in my office kicks in $10 for the Mega Millions. Everyone except my boss and that a**hole from IT that no one can stand.

The next day we hit the jackpot, $500+ million gets divided up. We all quit. The business closes. My boss looses everything, and IT a**hole has to just go look for a new job.”

7. Lightning strike.

“I’d like to know what it feels like to be hit by a lighting.

But I’m also kinda scared if I think about it too much.

It will eventually find me because both my grandpa and my mom have gone through it (and survived it). So I kinda don’t really want to follow the tradition because I know it very well could happen to me.”

8. Diggin’ up bones.

“I want to dig up bodies like Edgar Allan Poe and Picasso just to see how they look and what they were buried with.”

9. That’s odd.

“I want to open a school for gold diggers.

Basically take in women/men who have no ambitions further than marrying rich and teach them everything that the “perfect assistant/wife/husband of a rich man/woman” needs to know how to do. Things like household management, handling of appointments, memos, calls, etc.

Get them work as assistants/secretaries to practice, and then when they graduate and are like, “finally I can go get a husband/wife” I can be like “surprise! You’re an extremely qualified executive assistant! Now go support yourself”

Just trick people who have no ambition/confidence in their skills into becoming highly qualified professionals.”

10. Mastermind.

“To get away with the perfect crime.

A heist of some kind. I think I could do it with enough preparation.”

11. Time for a break.

“To be hit by a car or otherwise seriously injured enough to end up in hospital for a while. Nothing to cause long term harm, but something that I could recover from after a few months.

I just want a break from life, it’s so exhausting pretending to be happy. I guess it’ll also reveal the people in my life that actually care about me, and those who are lying.”

12. No more work!

“To be retired.

I just want to not work and be able to enjoy life.

Generally when I say this people get angry and act like I’m some sort of villain.”

What’s your darkest desire?

Let us know in the comments!

Please and thank you!