You always have to take care of Number One, baby!
And I realize that can be hard sometimes…
But you gotta do it!
Because if you don’t love yourself, who will?
Let’s hear from folks on AskReddit about what’s holding them back from loving themselves.
“It’s my inconsistency and sluggishness due to my ADHD.
I have to work extra hard to present an acceptable output because I have to re-check everything that I did. I always have this fear that something like a small error might have slipped through my work because of my inattention, which could potentially affect the way people see me professionally because they’re thinking that someone of my calibre should have seen those in the first place.
It’s slowly chipping away the way I see myself. I’m afraid of stepping up my career because I know anytime in the future, I will f**k up. I’m working in the construction industry as an engineer, by the way.
With this condition, I’m having second thoughts about being a manager – about leading a group of people. I can’t even plan my week well, let alone a year-long construction project.
I know that I have potential. I’m deeply interested in my work. But having ADHD limits me. I feel inefficient. I feel stupid.”
2. Coming clean.
“The emotional damage I’ve caused to other people.
I generally like myself, but I’m not a good person, and I deserve the guilt I feel for it.”
“I am over sensitive, cannot seem to get over anything bad that has ever happened to me (though I know the reasons why).
I just can never get over the grief of losing something or someone and Self sabotage.”
4. No love.
“People can’t love me.
My family doesn’t, my friends certainly don’t, and every relationship I’m in I’m lied to.
So if no one else can love me, why should I be able to love myself, because apparently there’s nothing about me worth loving.”
5. Can’t connect.
“I feel I simply can’t connect to people, since my social skills are still pretty bad and I just have a very low social battery for almost everyone.
I’m not that smart, since I have a bad memory for so many things, and Im a very slow learner. And that worries me since I’m going to college very soon. I’m also very lazy often and have some depression, so it’s just so hard to get myself to do anything like working out or eating healthy, or talking to friends.
I’ve actually improved on this and I do take care of myself a lot now but I’m still really forcing myself to. Overall I just got a lot of issues that compound on each other. And I try to fix them, but it’s a real f**king challenge. But every day I wish I was someone else with a new personality.”
6. Keep going!
“My weight and side profile (double chin).
I’ve been making progress and making myself proud, I’m getting there.”
“I’m a complete failure of a man.
No friends, no job, never been in a relationship, still a virgin at 19 soon to be 20, still living with my parents.
I’m not (completely) s**cidal, but I’d be lying if I never said I looked at my shotgun and wondered what it would feel like.”
8. Beauty standards.
“I feel ugly in that I don’t fit American/European standards of beauty.
Hell, I probably don’t fit any standards of beauty. So much pressure and “value” is placed on women based on their looks.
I also feel socially awkward, but I know some of that is due to my lack of self-esteem.”
9. Can’t move on.
“The pain I caused to the person I loved most.
Ironically they’ve likely long since moved on yet I’m unable to.”
10. Not good enough.
“The complete lack of any belief in myself.
This takes many forms. People who congratulate me for doing something, i’ll think it’s them just being nice not because i actually did something good.
Or when i’m learning something and my teacher doesn’t point out any mistakes, i will think it’s because they don’t think it’s worth because i’m a lost cause not because I just didn’t make any mistakes that they noticed.
I always assume I’m not good enough, or not worth the effort.”
11. What can I offer?
“I genuinely don’t think I have anything to offer the world.
I feel like if I were gone I’d be easily replacable because there’s really not all much about me.”
“The sense that my existence was a mistake, that I have failed at everything I ever tried to do, and that the people in my life would all be better off if they had never met me.”
What’s holding you back from loving yourself?
Let us know in the comments.
Thanks a lot!