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Sometimes, kids say the funniest things.

Like the time 5-year-old Bindi Irwin met her baby brother Robert, and decided that he should be called Brian “for short.”

Well back in January, feminist author @JessicaValenti tweeted about an incident that happened when her child was about that same age:

It was a great metaphor for life, and it spawned a whole thread of users telling funny things that their own children had said.

A lot of users focused on how children don’t pull punches, sometimes being brutal without even meaning to.

Picture book author Pat Zietlow Miller shared a time when her young daughter innocently cut her to the quick:

And another user shared her child’s response to her own midlife crisis hairdo.

Kids, man. Brutal, and brutally honest.

Sometimes they’re just trying to be helpful though, like when Heidi Hodges’ daughter overruled her little brother’s kindness.

And we all know what it’s like to be seen as the not-fun parent, but I love this user’s response.

I guess it would be way too mean to respond, “I know Dad’s the fun parent, just like your brother is the fun child.”

Yeah, you’re right. Parents have to be the parent, fun or otherwise.

Some of the one-liners parents shared were just hilarious, liked this one from Bonnie Jean:

Use the Force, Luke. Be the armadillo.

I love it.

And you know, it makes sense, because kids just really love animals.

So comparisons to animals are usually a compliment:

Until they try to turn you into one:

Kids, as we all know, also like to eat weird things.

(Let’s hope this isn’t why the 5-year-old wanted to turn her sister into a fish…)

And this kid… The shade.

But I mean, he has a point.

And just… wow.

Weird eating habits aside, sometimes even the best kids will misbehave.

As parents, you just have to teach them how to say they’re sorry.

Even if it makes you want to bust out laughing.

And when life gets them down:

Teach them to look on the bright side.

(This kid must have been friends with @welshlady17’s little girl.)

It’s so true what they say. Kids really do say the darndest things.

What’s something hilarious that a small child in your life has said? Tell us in the comments!