Every family dynamic is different.
Some people tell their parents absolutely everything, and some only give their mom and dad the minimum information. And some of us fall in between.
I have a great relationship with my parents, but there are just some things that they don’t need to know about and that I definitely would never tell them in the first place.
Are you ready to hear some secrets?
Then pay attention, because AskReddit users shared the secrets they keep from their moms and dads. Let’s see what they had to say.
“I’m pretty sure my brother and I have intimacy issues because of them.
I hate pointing fingers because it solves nothing, but there’s a reason your sons are in their 30s and only now getting to know women…”
2. Can’t tell her.
“That my mom is responsible for most of the issues I have been medicated and in therapy for the last 2 decades for.
It took me a long time to admit it to myself and it would destroy the relationship we do still have.”
3. Well, you’re making a living.
“Hey mom and dad. Remember that “freelance graphic design” job I started 4 years ago? The one I was making more money than my old job at?
I’m actually drawing furry and pony p*rn. Loads of it. Even worse than that, some might not even be legal in the US, I’m not really sure. Technically they are animals, but I can’t turn down half my monthly mortgage for 4 hours of work if someone wants some foalcon or cub art. They pay a premium for extreme stuff like that and I can’t resist the money.
So yeah. Sorry about that. I definitely am not designing people logos. I’m not even sure if there is money in that anymore. I know for a fact my artist friends that don’t do porn aren’t making nearly as much as me despite some being vastly superior artists. Hopefully you are at least proud of me for being self sufficient.”
“I am incredibly depressed and have been diagnosed as an adult as having autism.
It explains so much about my life including my conflict with my parents, but I have gotten so good at pretending to be a functioning person.
I can’t reopen any wounds with them. It would destroy them.”
5. Not gonna happen.
“I got a vasectomy.
My mum really wants grandchildren but it’s never going to be from me. I’ve been very open about not wanting children, but she thinks it’s just a phase. The main reason that I can’t tell them, is that my sister has been trying and unfortunately failing for years.
The pressure has slowly shifted towards me being the one to carry on the name and so on… I think it would break her heart.”
6. Bad parents.
“I’d never tell my parents that they were sh*t parents.
I wasn’t the easiest kid to raise but that doesn’t excuse how I was treated.
I use that as motivation as to how I raise my kids.”
7. A non-believer.
“That I don’t really believe in God.
My parents are heavily Christian and they believe that I am a devout follower of the church since I had been chosen multiple times to pray or read the bible in front of the mass.
In reality, I just move with the flow since I don’t want to disappoint them and I had made very close friends with some of the people I have met in the church.
This will likely break my father’s heart since he is a pastor and has raised me to become a Christian his whole life.”
8. Odd person out.
“That I’m the odd one in the family and that’s purely because I sought out higher education and learned to think critically and not accept what I hear unless I do a bit or research on it.
I’ve had so many arguments because they think I’m invalidating their opinion and being a smart *ss when the reality is that they’re ignorant and too lazy to learn.”
9. Forced into it.
“I’m angry that they never allowed me to pick up a trade instead forced me to go to university, which I hated and left after 3 months and have been working 8-5 jobs since”
“They make me sick. I am embarrassed and make every excuse to avoid them now that I’m older.
Every time they would see anything negative about western culture I had to listen to the ‘This is why Islam will conquer the world soon’ oh and their favourite ‘Barack Obama is Muslim, a black person can’t be intelligent enough to become President unless they are Muslim’….
If my white friends from school used to come around, my parents would be the nicest people imaginable but the moment they left they would make me wash the dishes ‘properly’ if my friends touched them because a non-muslim has made the dishes impure.”
“I lost my virginity in their brand new Jeep Grand Cherokee.
Once with a chick, and once with a guy.”
“The fact they’re view point on life is dumb.
They’re Muslims and very religious. And they force me to be as well. They think that there is one religion, Islam, and the others are lies. I am 15 and I am an athiest.
I am an introvert and don’t like socializing, but they don’t undersand that. They force me into social situations that make me feel uncomfortable. They always shout at me for staying in my room all day and not talking with them.
I am also bis*xual. Them being Muslim, they think that’s wrong. That alone makes me depressed.”
13. Cut off.
“I can’t tell my mom that since I’ve cut her off this last time, I’m absolutely prepared to keep it up this time.
I already regret that she will eventually die without us mending things and I KNOW that I will wish things were different. That I’d just stayed in her life. But in the here and now, she’s a toxic f*cking being and my mourning is solely for the fact that I no longer hope that someday it will be better. I forgive her, but I can’t do it anymore.
I can’t tell her that her 8 y/o grandson hasn’t even asked about her or questioned her lack of presence in the 6 months since hes last seen her, because her presence isn’t missed.
I can’t tell her that she really needs help, or that I sincerely hope she gets it, and I absolutely can’t tell her that unless she does something she will very likely end up completely alone because most of my family have already given up.
Theres a lot I can’t tell her, because my life is better without her in it, and that breaks my heart.”
14. A long one…
“I’m truly unhappy. I hate my life so much. You’re not making it easier on me.
You never see me as a person with wants and needs and ambition, just someone that’ll work for you, that’ll make your paperwork, care for my siblings, go to their parent-teacher-meetings, clean, drive you around and be your translator. It’s fine, I’ve decided to give up on living to be able to support you, and I don’t expect any thank yous, but please, at least don’t tell me I’m not doing anything for you. I gave up so much for you.
I’m just in my early 20s, but I’m burning out. I have decided to not have kids or maybe to never be in a proper relationship. It doesn’t feel like I have the mental capacity for neither. I’m a little bummed about it, cause since I can remember I’ve always wanted to adopt two kids. That’s how I saw myself, but at this point I’m not sure I can care for another person. I don’t love you guys, and you know that.
There’s resentment from my past, the days you beat us up and told us how f*cking little you thought of us. I remember the belt, I remember the hot water, I remember the beatings in the shower or the additional beatings cause we cried. I was ready to give up that resentment, to move on, bc both of you are trying rn. You’re trying to change but it’s too late.
You’re still not seeing the extent of suffering you cause me and my siblings. I’m not happy and if I ever decided to live my life fully, you’d probably disown me, beat me or f*cking kill me.
You don’t care about me or about the things I’ve done for you or given up for you, you only care about what others think of you, even if it costs all our happiness. I’m not sure how long I’ll be able to continue like this. I need out.
Also one more thing, you remember me wetting myself so often as a kid? Turns out, it was probably cause of trauma. My cousin used me back then, s*xually. That might have been it. But I never told you, just got beaten up more for pissing myself.
I’m still here, still going to be here. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still thankful for many other things but I’m just so f*cking unhappy and exhausted.”
How about you?
What are some secrets you keep from your parents?
Share your thoughts with us in the comments. Thank you!