Okay folks, I’m not trying to bum you out today, but the truth is that you NEED to know this stuff.
I’m referring to knowing about the signs that someone you’re involved with is cheating on you…
Yeah, it ain’t pretty, but consider this a learning moment.
Check out what folks on AskReddit had to say about this.
1. Sounds familiar…
“When their roommates ask to meet with you privately, and tell you that your GF was having someone over in their room with the music on loud.”
The same thing she’d do when we’d get busy at her place…”
“When they want to “take a break” and reevaluate things in the relationship, but in reality they just want to get with their ex without feeling any guilt.”
I was in Arizona with my ex and she had this coke dealer who I was sort of friends with and I was talking to him about where I could buy a knife (I like knives) and he told me because he thought I knew and was planning to stab the guy.”
4. Not a good sign.
“They are asking you constantly what you’d do if they cheated, like some sort of litmus test or something. My ex fiance asked me that a ton over the course of our last year together.
I never thought anything of it; I’m the type to blindly trust you 10000% until you give me reason not to. Turns out, she was cheating on me with multiple dudes, some she was even s**ting while we fell asleep spooning at night. This was back in 2018 and I’m still not okay.”
5. Knew it!
“My ex would sleep with her phone under her pillow.
I had an idea it was happening and would keep an eye on this guy’s MySpace page.
Then he posted one of the questionnaire things that were popular at the time, one of the questions was who did you last kiss? And his answer was my ex.
MySpace Tom had my back.”
6. A big shift.
“It’s happened to me a few times now, and invariably there is a seismic shift in the relationship. I can remember pinpointing the day something changed, and suddenly you aren’t being texted first, they’re busy and can’t hang out as much, and s** almost always stops or becomes very infrequent.
The partner seems colder, further away, and less enthusiastic. It’s hard to describe, but you can feel something is off. At least, it’s always been that way, in my opinion.
What’s worse is the times when you confront them about the change in the dynamic, and they tell you nothing’s wrong, or nothing’s changed, and you feel like you’re going crazy because you know something off, but you don’t want to push it and be needy or clingy. And you suffer silently until you push it or the truth inevitably comes out.”
7. Well, there’s that…
“You catch them having s** with someone else.
It even worse if they don’t stop.”
8. That’s wild.
“I had a cool/odd/crazy/shitty experience.
I talk in my sleep and one day (three months before we were to get married) I had a nightmare about my ex cheating on me with a guy I worked with and I actually woke both of us up mumbling some shit about it.
When I told her what my dream was she got cagey, so I checked our cellphone bill and found out that she had been texting that very same guy non stop for weeks. I confronted her and she admitted to cheating on me with him.
A dream set me free. What’s also funny is that I don’t recall having any kind of trust issues with him and her when we hung out, but something inside me apparently did.”
9. It starts small.
“Changing passwords to devices after being okay with you having access to them. Lack of intimacy over long stretches of time.
No longer wanting to sleep next to you at all, go on dates, or do anything a couple would usually do. And my biggest flag is finding things that you’re damn sure aren’t yours, but they try to pass the item off like it’s always been yours.
I’ll never have ‘solid’ proof that I was cheated on, but my instincts were screaming it when our s** life went away, then he wanted to sleep on the couch every single night. Then he started changing his passwords as my paranoia kicked in. First fight happened at this point.
Next came him keeping me out of photos on purpose that he would share on his social media accounts, just in case people thought we were dating, which we were. That was when I caught him talking to someone through PS4 and online, she thought he was single. Fight two happened then and I was in denial because he was gaslighting me so much.
It escalated to him wanting to be gone every weekend ‘to a buddy’s house’ and I was never allowed to come along and eventually I found makeup in my car after one of those Pal Weekends. I don’t wear makeup unless it’s a special occasion, usually, and when I do wear it, it’s only around my eyes so I know this didn’t belong to me as it was lip gloss. Final fight and we didn’t stay together.
To everyone out there, it usually starts small and gets bigger over time. Trust yourself to see the signs and leave.”
10. All about the phone.
“These days, watch their phone behaviour, for starters.
Do they hide the screen when you walk behind them? Have they added a password or changed the password? (This may be innocent but could be suspicious.) Are they texting into the wee hours of the night while neglecting you? Have they disabled the little notifications that pop up without having to unlock the phone?
Some of these might not be a problem on their own, but you’ll often notice other behaviours at the same time, like they ignore and neglect you more, find reasons to be in another room, take their phone to the bathroom all the time, or go for lots of breaks away from you.
You’re on the lookout for secretive behaviours, neglect, and distance.”
When they bring someone up over and over in even the most tangentially related situations.
If they say it’s an innocuous friendship or a collegue but their name keeps coming up all the time, chances are you’re right to be concerned.”
12. Signs to look for…
“Random phone calls. Her phone will ring, suddenly she has to go into another room to answer it.
Random disappearances. She’ll be gone inexplicably for hours at night with no explanation. And how dare you ask for one! You don’t OWN her! (No, but we WERE married…)
Loss of s**. You either get very reduced or no s** at all depending on how committed they are to keeping up the pretence that all is normal.
Random emotions. Their emotional states appears to have nothing to do with you. They might be really happy or really angry and it just comes out of the blue.
Lack of interest in talking to you.
Suddenly being judgemental of you – nothing you do is any good any more. The real reason is because they don’t actually want to BE with you any more.
Wanting to go on a holiday without you and the kids, just for a break.
Walking into their bedroom to ask them a question and they scream and shove their laptop closed and collapse over it hugging it protectively in their arms, while shaking. And that was when I knew for sure. I just walked out.”
Do you have anything to add to this?
If so, let us know in the comments.
Thanks a lot!