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It’s always a bummer to get called out by someone you love but it’s even worse when they do it in front of other people…especially when it’s family.
And this woman is now wondering if she responded a little bit too harshly after her husband did just that.
Let’s see what happened.
AITA for how I responded after my husband asked why I’m being so “unladylike” infront of my whole family?
“To begin I’d like to mention that my husband (39) is the breadwinner (he works in airlines as a pilot/always working) while I’m a stahm taking care of our home and our 3 kids (5yrs,3yrs,6months).
Lately we’ve having few arguments with him complaining about me not taking care of myself/looks and being always busy with chores and whatnot.
We got invited to my parents house last night. once we sat down for dinner, Mom, sister and I started talking about preparations for my sister’s wedding. My sister talked about her hair, makeup, dress etc.
My husband kept giving me looks and raising his eyebrow whenever the words “haircut” or “makeup” or “new dress” got brought up. He decided to pitch in the conversation and started openly criticizing my current look and how “unladylike ” I’ve become recently especially after our third child was born. He went on commenting on how much he’d like me to change my hair color, get my nails done or buy new “nice” dresses to wear like other wives do for once.
I was stunned, mouth wide open and so were my parents. Bil was laughing secretly and my sister was looking at me head to toe a in “poor sister” type of way. My husband didn’t stop at that and ranted about how I should start taking care of “us” and be more energetic, positive, outgoing, s**y and so on and so on. Then he looked at me and asked why I’ve come to be so unladylike all of a sudden. And kept looking at me in a “what ever happened to you?/what changed?” Type of way.
I was….mad I loudly said “behind every unladylike, miserable woman…there’s a trashy, negative a**hole man”. And pointed out what changed and that is him not pulling enough weight in child care, delaying, making excuses and putting house chores upon me constantly while he posts on facebook about what an amazing work he does to provide for us.
I cook, clean, wash, do laundry, get up with the baby and feed and change and bath and so on. He reminded me that I’m the STAHP and he’s the money maker. I’ve pointed out that there are a LOT of dads who are money makers and still do their part as a partners and parents.
He was stunned, dumbfounded as everyone was looking at him in an awkward embarrassing way. He got quiet the rest of the visit. Just looking down and avoiding eye contact with everyone in the room.
He blew up in the car asking what the hell possessed me to go off on him like that infront of his inlaws who now have a very “false”, very “misleading” impression of him. He said no matter what happens I should never share our private issues with family. I reminded him of who brought it up first and he called me petty for making a scene to get back at him only for giving me some innocent advice.
He’s sulking rn… did I go too far?.
Info: To give some background I’m not neglecting myself, I do my hair at home, I do activities and wear eye but not full makeup. My husband says I should do more for myself like go to the salon with my sister or friends, and go shop for new dresses.
He says he’s just giving me advice and this topic isn’t something I should be upset about. I might’ve been on the oversensitive side lately but I feel like he was being pushy and he thinks I ruined his relationship with my family with what I said.”
Here’s what Reddit users had to say about this.
One reader said that this woman was not wrong and that they think the in-laws know exactly what this guy is like.
Photo Credit: Reddit
Another reader said that their parents definitely wouldn’t stand for this kind of nonsense.
Photo Credit: Reddit
This Reddit user made a joke about the husband that seems pretty accurate.
Photo Credit: Reddit
And this reader had a great idea about to handle the husband. I hope they try it!
Photo Credit: Reddit
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